Part I
This is how the M.s, a typical American family, discovered
the simple life that characterized the United States of
decades ago, in fact, not just America.
"For our family," says Mrs. M. vigorously, "less has been
more."
The race after endless material attainments embroils modern
society in a race which has no purpose. We certainly do not
need proof that a simple and modest lifestyle is the best and
most desirable one. However, those few among us, whether they
are being carried away unintentionally or whether they are
attempting to copy the standard of living of the West, know
that the winds are blowing in a new direction in that
selfsame western society to which they turn with upraised
eyes. What do they think -- those who do -- about the rat
race known as the Western, mainly American, lifestyle?
American papers are claiming lately, "Modern life is too
rich. Too much information has to be read, too many products
call to us to buy them..." The author of the book, To Live
the Simple Life tells us: "We are running ourselves
ragged in the effort to reach all of our goals." Life is
short, they say today, even in the U.S. So we have to
carefully weigh for what we squander our resources. On what
we spend money, in what we invest energy and most important,
on what we expend our time. Is `this' all really important to
us?
Today, Mrs. M. doesn't believe that once she was able to live
and function as she did. For a long time, she would get up
earlier and earlier in order to get everything done in her
packed schedule. On the other hand, she went to sleep later
and later each night. And in spite of this, the pressure
didn't let up. It just increased every day.
All in all, she would say to herself, she is a typical
American woman. All she had to do was to function as a
mother, housewife -- as well as a respected professional. She
was a medical technician. So why didn't she ever have enough
time?
Her husband, a lawyer, admits that's exactly how he feels.
Why are they, successful parents and professionals, not
satisfied with their lot? Why are they always stressed out
and pressured? So for the first time, a heart-to-heart talk
led to the conclusion that was the first step on the road to
reform. They understood that something wasn't right. They
decided that they had to look for something to do about it.
"We knew that we had to decide what's really important," Mrs.
M. said.
What was really important, the M. family discovered, was to
invest time in their three-year-old son, with the goal of
endowing him with everything that devoted parents need to
give their children.
It wasn't easy, but Mrs. M. decided to quit her job so that
she could invest in her home. In order to maintain a portion
of her salary, she looked for alternative work, with an
hourly wage so that it wouldn't affect her new schedule. She
printed calling cards with the intriguing slogan; "At your
service -- buy yourself free time." From then she began to
work at tasks that people generally have difficulty finding
time for: shopping, paying bills, organizing parties and
events, research -- whatever the client requested and paid
for.
"I still work hard," she admits, "but the fact that I can
choose my own hours changes everything. I divide up my time
in such a way that I have enough free time to devote to my
son. My migraine headaches have vanished without a trace. I
have opportunity to get to know my neighbors. It's pleasant
and it also saves time. We exchange babysitting."
The story of the M.s isn't unusual. A Gallup poll revealed
that half of all Americans believe that they don't have
enough time to do what they really want to. Moreover, 54% of
parents in the United States say that they devote too little
time to their children. And 47 percent claim that they don't
have enough time for their family.
Why don't they have enough time? Only after one tries to
answer this basic question can they decide on time-saving
steps. No more chasing after luxuries or surrendering to the
pressures of work and life. The cry of "Let's live the simple
life" is heard today even in America.
All Beginnings are Hard
You have to start the day off right. K.B., a teacher in
Baltimore, learned this lesson by herself. K. has two
children. Every morning, the parents hurry off and the
children are left to struggle almost single-handedly with the
task of getting out of the house and arriving ready and on
time to school.
K. says: "My husband and I had to leave at exactly 7:45. The
children were left behind. They were always missing books.
Teachers' notes were forgotten. My son, especially, isn't
particularly agile in the morning, so he was always
disoriented and bewildered and his worst time of day was
exactly the time that I needed him at his best. When my
husband and I left the house, everyone was in a bad mood."
What do you do? Change arrangements. Thus, a new approach was
adopted in their home. The principle was simple: Whatever
could be done the day before, down to the last detail, was.
No one went to sleep without organizing for the next day. It
was decided ahead of time what the children would wear, and
their clothes were prepared by their beds, down to the belts.
At night, they checked what shirts needed ironing, whether
there was a button missing and if the shoelaces needed
replacing.
Even the breakfast table is set in advance. The children were
given jobs: to set up the cereal bowls, the spoons and the
cups. Everything is waiting for them at breakfast. And in
order to make it easier on the parents, a coffeemaker that
works on a timer was acquired. It starts to work fifteen
minutes before the alarm clock wakes up the household. When
they get to the kitchen, a steaming hot cup of fresh coffee
is waiting for them. America, no?
"We make a list of what the children need for school, like
notebooks with homework, library books, permission slips, and
then each child goes over his list before going to sleep and
checks that everything is ready." This is the advice given by
an organizational counselor.
Isn't it possible to run a house without a professional
advice that is intended by its nature for factories and
business? The answer is: No. The United States has turned
into a power of plenty but has lost along the way simple
basic common-sense rules of family behavior. What parents
didn't get from their parents, they have to learn from
outside sources: advisors, psychologists, even the papers.
We can't end this part without one more piece of advice based
on media surveys. Put everything in its usual place,
especially the KEYS. It's hard to believe, but studies have
shown that an adult wastes 16 hours a year looking for
misplaced keys. [Make a few extra and hide them around the
house, or place them by kind stay-at-home neighbors.]
To be continued...
