Dei'ah veDibur - Information & Insight

A Window into the Chareidi World

15 Kislev 5763 - November 20, 2002 | Mordecai Plaut, director Published Weekly









Produced and housed by
Shema Yisrael Torah Network
Shema Yisrael Torah Network












Mountain Dreams
by Danya Boksenboim and Rifca Goldberg

The idea of hosting a writers' conference in the holy city of Safed was a longtime dream that catapulted into fast forward. Our writing group meets weekly and we dreamed together of inviting other women from out of Safed to come and share together with us in our creative endeavors, to let our creative energies merge to generate more and more writings. Once the dream began to materialize, it took less time than we thought possible (although lots of work!) in coming true.

Walking Your Child Through a Problem

by R' Zvi Zobin

"Abba! I can't reach that bag. Can you get it for me?"

Abba can react in one of two ways. He can reach up and take it down from the shelf. Or he can say, "You know, it's quite high for me as well. How do you think I can get to it?"

by A. Ross, M.Ed.

It would be interesting to know how many readers are going to skim over this article, or how many will reach for the dictionary. The title is a fancy word for a very common childhood habit. In fact, it is not only common in children; there are many adults who indulge in the habit, too. It just means `hair pulling.' Any hair, be it eyebrows, eye lashes, beard or mustache. Some do it discreetly and some pull so frequently that they have bald patches on the head or in the beard.

Private Conversations

by Menucha Fuchs

Private conversations between parents and their children are of paramount importance in family life. Private talks bring the two sides closer. They help the child understand that his mother truly loves him and that his father really cares, since they bother to take out time to hear what he has to say.


Dear Editor,

I would like to take this opportunity to tell you how much I enjoy the Home and Family section for providing helpful and thoughtful articles for religious women.

I am sure your readers will be interested in a project in my community whose goal is to provide kosher Jewish reading for women and their families.

Big Red and Sunshine
by Rifca Goldberg

He came running up to me, his eyes overflowing with excitement, clutching something. I didn't really want to know what that something might be. I just wanted to dash to the store as fast as possible. My six- year-old daughter had fallen and broken her leg three days before and was being watched at my house now by our neighbor.

by Esther Marilus

If epdiurals are the so-called `Rolls-Royce' of anesthetics, Natural Childbirth is no horse and buggy! Nature is the Gold Standard!

Your Medical Questions Answered!
by Joseph B. Leibman, MD

Emergencies in pregnancy. As pregnancy completely changes the physiology of a woman's body (as we discussed in the first article in this series), one of the changes that can happen is the processing of sugars. Hormones from the placenta can induce a diabetes during pregnancy. This condition is routinely monitored by the obstetrician and is treated like regular diabetes except for two important differences.

Lose Fat -- Not Bone: Avoid A Serious
Side Effect Of Weight Loss

By Dr. Reuven Bruner, Ph.D.

If you're dieting, you may be losing more than body fat. Women who lose more than 3 kilograms also lose a significant bone mineral density in the process. This doesn't mean to say you should forget about losing those excess pounds. We definitely want to encourage everybody to eliminate excess weight, because the number 1 killer of women is cardiovascular disease, and extra pounds increase the risk of heart disease.


Mothers Who Ache
[sent in anonymously]

Mothers who ache
in the heart, with loss, living loss,
with nightmares to face
during the day
stalked by unanswered questions
each night.

Mothers who ache,
mass quantities of tears
never quite depleting the wells of their heart
pumping deeper for water to make more tears,
the tears storming the gates of Heaven.
The gatekeepers already know
these mothers who ache.

They ache even as they tend to the other children,
light candles and cry over their flames
still aching as they cover the little ones into sleep,
they wander from room to room
holding on to their Tehillim,
They would press them into their very hearts if they could
to come closer to the source of their ache.

They sing with their children
they mend their torn clothes
and they smile at their neighbors

extra strong --
these are not the losses one can tell about...
the loss throbs with loneliness,
unbearable secrets that must be borne.

The mothers who ache seek a measure of comfort,
turning to Rabbanim, Rebbetzins,
from kivrei tzaddikim to the Kosel,
segulos, tzedoka,
from writing their poems,
shiurim, Tehillim,
a still walk in the woods,
from acts of chessed,
baking a cake with the other children,
from knowing that loneliness no matter how intense:
is illusionary,
for mothers who ache are never alone.

Hashem hovers close, close enough
for the mothers who ache
to take the gift of His presence,
unwrap it and hold it
this moment and the next,
and the next and the next,
hallowed spaces unknown before.

Hashem gives these moments
to mothers who ache.

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