At a recent family gathering, one of my daughters-in-law told
us an inspiring true story that I must share with you.
Her sister graduated from a local Bais Yaakov High School
about fifteen years ago. Almost all of the "girls" in her
class (who are now women in their early thirties) have been
married for years. However, as this story began, one of the
classmates was still single — at age 32.
An amazing woman who was part of the class decided this
situation was intolerable. Yes, I know, in recent years the
problem of older singles has been addressed by leading
personalities in the Torah world and there are now
organizations working around the clock to solve this very
problem, but that was not good enough for our heroine.
She decided to mobilize all of the women in the class to do
something. She called every class member and explained the
problem and suggested a solution. The women in the class
would say Tehillim and participate in a Mishmeret Shemiras
Haloshon on behalf of their friend. The organizer would
call each classmate to remind them and to encourage them.
These calls were not sporadic, not monthly and not weekly.
She called each classmate every single day! No answering
machine chizuk and no games of telephone tag. She
would note when each woman was available and call her
then.
Because of the organizer's constant involvement and
supervision, this was not one of those catch-me-on-the-run,
"Yes, I'll take from 6 to 8 a.m. bli neder if I
remember," kind. This was heavy duty commitment. In addition,
no one had to ask her children, "Do you happen to remember if
I said my Tehillim today?" Every chapter was said carefully,
paying attention to the meaning.
The unmarried classmate was considered everyone's best friend
and everyone's responsibility. The women in this class really
worked together and they literally stormed the Heavens day
after day for a month.
How do I know it was a month? Because it was after 30 days
— just one month — that a miracle occurred. After
nearly fifteen years of being "in the parsha" of
shidduchim, the last "girl" became a kallah! I
still get goose bumps every time I think of it.
After I heard the story, I was on a real "high." My first
words were, "Boruch Hashem! That's wonderful news. Thank you
so much for telling us."
I was literally in awe of the woman who organized and
orchestrated the project. I wondered if I could ever have
done what she did. When I was younger, I did initiate some
good projects in the community where I lived and I did drum
up the enthusiasm to get them up and running.
An after-school program of Chumash and Mishnayos classes for
second to sixth graders that I organized for my sons and
their friends ran for years and did much to enrich the
curriculum at our local school. The prizes that the children
won motivated them to stay in the program and inspired their
younger brothers to join. I also started a few successful
fundraising projects that are still going after almost twenty
years.
However, I don't think I ever put as much concentrated effort
into any of my community efforts as the organizer of this
project devoted to hers. "That's okay," I thought, "Most of
us are not chiefs. The world needs a lot of Indians as well."
Over the years, most of the projects I have been involved in
were started and led by others. I have been just one of the
many people who lent a hand.
Then it hit me. I have participated in so many
mishmaros and said so many chapters of Tehillim
over the years. In some cases, we were privileged to hear
good news, but unfortunately there were many, many instances
where a seriously ill person did not survive, or a person who
was in need of a marriage match, children, livelihood or any
other type of yeshua did not receive one.
I could not help wondering if perhaps a little more effort on
the part of each of us just-plain participants could have led
to a different result. Did we really storm the Heavens or did
we "do our thing" on automatic pilot?
Of course, we don't know what was decided Above and whether
things could have been changed by even the best of our
efforts. But that did not mean that we couldn't have tried
harder and just perhaps have accomplished more.
On the one hand, Moshe Rabbeinu prayed, unsuccessfully, with
all of his heart to be allowed to enter Eretz Yisroel. Even
with maximum effort, we know that our prayers are not on the
level of Moshe Rabbeinu's. On the other hand, is the example
we just had of the class of women who expended maximum effort
and saw their prayers answered so beautifully.
It is easy to get discouraged by looking at our record of
accomplishments and, more to the point, at our list of
failures. We can't change the past and it isn't even healthy
to dwell on our past mistakes. We have to learn from what we
did wrong, regret what we did, and — most important
— correct things for the future.
I am very grateful to my daughter-in-law for sharing this
story and even more grateful to the woman who organized the
project, kept it going, and thereby demonstrated for us its
wonderful results. We see what just one month of truly
sincere effort on the part of one group of women can
accomplish.
I know that there may very well be a "next time" when someone
calls and says, "We are organizing a Mishmeret. Can you take
two hours?" or "Mrs. X.'s sister is going in for surgery
tomorrow morning. We are trying to complete Sefer Tehillim
during the time of the procedure. Can you take chapters
51 to 60?"
I have already resolved that bli neder my response
will not be a rote, "Hold on while I get a pen. Now what is
the name and the name of her mother?"
The next time, I will really try to internalize the message
that there is more at stake than I ever realized. I will try
to be a more active member of the select group of Tehillim
sayers or Mishmeret participants that is busy storming
the Heavens.
Now that I know the amazing difference we can make, I will
put more effort into the words of the Tehillim and
into their meaning. I will really work on not speaking,
listening to or accepting any loshon hora during my
Mishmeret (and hopefully beyond it).
Who knows? Maybe through my determination to "go the extra
mile," the next project I am asked to join will be the
ultimate success, the one that brings us to the Final
Redemption, may it come soon in our days.
