Over the years that I have been teaching, I have encountered
a number of students who told me they are "learning disabled"
(LD). My impression was that for many of them, "LD" might be
an inappropriate label and that having that label contributed
to their poor performance! Let's discuss why this is so and
what can be done to help underachievers and students with
minor learning disabilities to reach their potential.
ATTITUDE
By "attitude" we mean your opinion of someone, your feelings
towards him etc. Many people don't make the connection, but
what you are thinking on the inside manifests itself on the
outside. Your attitude comes through even if you do not voice
it. It is broadcasted loud and clear in your non-verbal
communication: voice tone, facial expressions, gestures.
Children are especially sensitive to this.
The attitude of the parents and teachers towards the child
with a minor LD or who is an underachiever can make a
tremendous difference in how that child performs -- for good
or for bad. In some ways, it can be worse to just have
a negative attitude than to express it orally. When
someone's non-verbal communication mismatches his verbal
communication, the other person may think, "So that's
what they think of me..."
What are some examples of unresourceful attitudes:
PITY: "Oh, nebich, let me help you..."
DISCOURAGING ENCOURAGEMENT: "I'm not saying that you're going
to be the world's greatest genius, but you really can do a
lot more than you think you can..."
SARCASM: "Excellent... for a two year old..."
ANGER: "GET TO WORK BEFORE I..."
All generalizations eventually break down -- including this
one! In other words, there can be certain situations where
having and even voicing attitudes like these might be right.
However, there is a big difference between deliberately
choosing these attitudes and just having them out of
habit.
Make a personal inventory to see what your attitudes are and
then decide if you want to keep or change them. You can do
this by either (1) having someone observe you and tell you
what messages they receive from your non-verbal
communication. (Prepare yourself for a possible shock from
what they report back to you!) Or
(2) Take notice what your thoughts are when you're with
certain people and in certain situations. Are you thinking in
a manner similar to some of the expressions listed above? Do
you want to be thinking this way?
What should be our attitude? In most cases, encouragement --
without any fine print. Hold in your mind something like, "We
all have our limitations and can go far beyond what we think
we're capable of doing when we apply ourselves." You might
keep some of your own limitations in mind, too. If the
learner has a talent, hold that in your mind as well. This
will produce an entirely different non-verbal communication.
When you feel it is appropriate, you can, of course,
verbalize these messages.
In case you're thinking that you might be able to mask your
true attitudes, be aware that studies show that the average
person cannot suppress his body language for more than about
30 seconds!
*
"Reuven" is a young man with a learning disability that
resulted from an unfortunate childhood accident which caused
some brain damage. He had been in special education programs
for most of his life. His reading skills were very poor. Even
though he was intelligent, able to converse on a wide variety
of topics, was popular with friends and captain of his
school's sports team, he had very low self esteem. His
principal told me that Reuven thought of himself as `sub-
human.'
The special education program Reuven had learned in was
certainly of great benefit to him. Now he was ready for
something different. When he entered a regular (not special
education) yeshiva program for boys from weaker backgrounds,
Reuven was able to make breakthroughs he had never thought
possible. This changed the way he looked at himself and
undoubtedly, the course of his life as well. To be sure, he
encountered many social and academic challenges. He also
discovered the pleasure of putting in steady efforts and that
such efforts produced results.
At the end of the year, he embarked on a self-initiated
learning program. He decided what to learn, as well as when
and with whom to learn it. After about a month, he was able
to read, explain and had basically memorized the first page
of Masechta Taanis. When he first entered the yeshiva,
it was inconceivable to him that he should be able to
accomplish anything like this.
Not making an issue of his learning disability, not preparing
him for failure, but rather letting him explore his own
strengths and break through his perceived limitations at his
own pace and in his own way all contributed to giving Reuven
a new self image.
Attitude also played a part. The attitude I adopted with him
was, "True -- you have a learning disability, but we all have
our limitations. You've already made a lot of breakthroughs.
Just keep going and you'll be amazed to see that you're going
to make many more."
Not every story has a happy ending. For example, "Yosef" was
diagnosed as LD and at age 18 was very worried about his
future. "I already know that I am never going to be very
successful," he told me. So convinced was he that he was
doomed to be a failure that he ignored the fact that he had
musical talent and an exceptional singing voice.
Unfortunately, Yosef had been exposed to so much
discouragement that he had developed a very negative
identity. Unlike Reuven, he was very resistant to working on
improving himself.
IDENTITIES
Identities are what come after the words, "I am..."
We are not born with our identities. We acquire them through
our life experiences -- including the attitude our families
and teachers have about us. We can have many identities but
may stress some more than others. Our identities are not
necessarily "true;" they can even be very inaccurate. They
can be changed. In our context, the question is: Do our
identities support our growth in learning or are they making
us into underachievers?
When a child is informed that he has a learning disability,
he will probably identify himself as "I am learning
disabled." The dictionary defines the word `disable' as `to
weaken or destroy the normal physical or mental abilities of;
incapacitate." Who would feel happy with the identity, "I am
someone whose learning has been weakened, destroyed or
incapacitated?" Not your typical teenager.
I remember growing up in New York City when the job title
"garbage man" was officially changed to "sanitation
engineer." It is not just a matter of semantics or
euphemisms. People perform better when their identity is
positive.
How can we counteract the effects of a negative identity? By
stressing a positive identity instead. One way to do this is
to create an identity based on an accomplishment of that
person. The formula is: "You are a person who ______ (fill in
their accomplishment/s)."
When the LD person identities himself as "I am learning
disabled", you can respond wtih an alternative identity such
as "You are a person who memorized the first page of
Taanis."
A second way is to create an identity based on talents and
abilities they have. "You are a person with musical talent
and an exceptional singing voice." You might add some
encouragement: "...and who can go far in the field of
music."
This is a powerful tool and with it, you can undo even some
of the most negative identities. Perhaps this is so because
these new identities are based on fact. On some level of
consciousness, the learner knows that they are true.
Parents and teachers have the advantage of being in constant
touch with the child to be able to reinforce these positive
identities. Make a list of their accomplishments and their
talents so you are always prepared and ready to suggest
resourceful, nurturing identities.
Next week: Learning Styles
