HOME & FAMILY

Five weeks ago an immediate relative of mine became critically ill. I was devastated, pained and bewildered. A deep sense of despondency overtook me. "Why me? Why doesn't Hashem send this nisoyon to someone else?" It seemed overwhelming in every sense of the word -- technically, financially and emotionally. Almost like slaying a dragon.

PREPARING FOR THE FUTURE
Total Perfection? Or is `Good' Good Enough?
by R' Zvi Zobin

Any type of remediation or therapy is invasive... Where is the point of diminishing returns? When is `well enough alone' to be recommended?

Elbow Grease
-- A Thorough Cleaning
by Menucha Fuchs

"I do a thorough cleaning only once every two weeks," Zehava, a mother of seven, said to me. "To be sure, during the week I tidy up and clean, all the time, but only on the surface..."

Life With Chickens
by Chava Dumas

Are we too hard-boiled to see the wonder and miracle in our simple daily egg?

Or to look beyond a surface-scratching of our daily lives and thank the Benevolent Hand that feeds us and watches over us...

A new insight into the first of our daily morning blessings, "...Who has given the cock intelligence..."

The Moody Child
by Masha Wolf, M.A.

HOW TO TEACH POSITIVE EXPRESSION

Research shows that children who express themselves positively are better liked by peers and adults. People gravitate towards positive people and shy away from those who express negativity, either verbally or nonverbally.

A Place for Everything and Everything in its Place
by M. Chevroni

Does tidiness depend on the beholder? Everyone has their own sense of tidiness. Some people feel physically ill at the sight of a messy house. When I see a balagan, I go into a decline, and have no energy to do a thing, certainly not enough to clear it up.

Why Aren't There Enough Good Shadchonim?

A letter from a reader:

I'd like the readers' reactions to this, writes S.M., not in writing, but in action and real life!

Your Medical Questions Answered!
by Joseph B. Leibman, MD

We are discussing bites. Perhaps the most common bite in Israel is from cats, and they have special considerations of their own.

Poet's Corner

Wedding Photo
by Ruth Lewis

My favorite photo of the wedding?
The kalla must have gone to
every studio in town,
seeking the best photographer.
Two albums, she has,
to show for it --
white-bound, inscribed in gold.
Full color photos,
from badecken to mitzva tanz.

And my favorite?
Well, actually -- none of those.
They're all lovely, but,
my heart's brimful of photos
no other camera caught:
my husband's eyes,
as he led in the chosson,
as candles flickered;
our younger children dashing
importantly about;
the chosson's mother
gazing at her son...

Yes, but my favorite.
Well, just for a moment,
right after the badecken
before we helped her from
her flower-framed, white chair,
before going to her chupa --
just for a moment,
her thick-veil slipped,
and I glimpsed:
the kalla's face,
my daughter's face,
so earnest, make-up smeared with tears,
eyes tight-shut,
lips murmuring in desperate prayer.
Then -- snap, I caught that picture,
I captured it forever.
I stored it, locked it safe within my heart.

Yes, on reflection,
I'd say that's my favorite.