Distributed by Feldheim, 127 charming pages
It's the authors who get all the credit and the editors
behind the scene who, nevertheless, also deserve a good
portion of it. And I am determined to get some of the kudos
for `building this nest' and launching many a
fledgling essay into the leafy world of this particular book.
And of many other books, if I do say so. And I do say so!
I'll put in a few good words for my own mentor, YATED, which
has given me and my favorite `pet' authors the professional
forum to express ideas and foist them on the public, with
excellent results. You have met Malka Adler, who, I believe,
appeared first in YATED and is now an accomplished author of
two books, going on her third and keeping it a secret from
us.
We have Rifca Goldberg, Sara Gutfreund, Leah Raffles, Raizel
Foner, Bayla Gimmel, Rosally Saltsman (a big-time writer by
now) and a few dozen other authors who may, or may not, have
made their debut on our pages, but were given lots of space
— to grow.
And so, dear readers, I will be very happy to accept any
compliments you wish to send my way. And as for those who
have been exposed to Miryam Steinberg in the somewhat distant
past, I expect you all to rush out and pick up this
delightful book. If you have any doubts, let me note that it
is reminiscent of Malka Adler's Sunny Slice of Life in
the afterglow that lingers with the reading of each piece and
the feeling that she said what you wanted to hear — and
very well at that.
THE HEART OF THE NEST: Children and Grandchildren / BUILDING
THE NEST: My Land and My People / FILLING THE HEART: House
and Home / and finally, EMPTYING THE NEST: Shidduchim and
Weddings.
These are the sections in this concise volume which aptly
mirror the very HOME AND FAMILY section which I edit and
present to YATED readers week after week. It's about the
Jewish home, the Jewish woman, the Jewish mother (and
stepmother and shviger) and her modest role but
palpable behind-the-scene impact on society. It's about aliya
and day-to-day conflicts and their resolutions.
Resolutions? Yes, I believe so. This book is full of a happy,
positive, `let's analyze and tackle this problem and make the
best of it' attitude to life. There's also lots and lots of
nostalgia and full circle reflections that make for
interesting, very pleasant reading with homespun flavor and,
I think, application to one's own dealing with life in
today's global shtetl of Yiddishkeit.
Yes, I think I really will take a lot of credit here. You
see, I first met Miryam at my dental clinic way back before
it became computerized and efficient, and you had to wait at
least half an hour before your turn. So we got to talking.
She told me she loves to write but no one had ever published
anything yet.
"Show me!" said I, a sucker for the printed and unprinted
word. The first stories were typewritten and pleasant to read
but not what I would want for my exclusive YATED clientele
and the goal-oriented editor who sits on top of my section.
They were delightful detective stories lacking a good Jewish
moral-to-the-story. So I gently guided Miryam and told her
how to channel her very obvious writing talent.
Before long, she was producing custom-tailored articles that
were just right. In fact, I think there was hardly anything
we rejected — once she was on the right track. Many of
the pieces in the book are familiar to me, and yet, I found
myself rereading them with great pleasure from a distance of
over ten years. Like vintage wine, the flavor improved with
age.
You will find yourself nodding in agreement when she writes
about Bubbies kvelling over grandchildren, in fact,
more over the distant ones than those around the corner, as
their parents complained. This bubby explains that "the
closer they are, the more you feel that they are truly an
extension of your own family. You put up with their tempers
and colic . . . You see their notebooks . . . and make them
birthday parties." And so, perhaps you try to focus on the
ones who are across the ocean to evoke your love. So what is
her equitable solution?
"I have started a wall of pictures in my bedroom, trying to
give some sort of equal time to all the families . . . It is
my attempt to show a physical manifestation of caring for all
at the same level. Probably it will not convince anyone of
anything." But it will convince the reader that Miryam is
trying to deal with a family not-problem but issue on a very
practical level.
This is the padding of a nest which we see built and
relocated, dealing with aliya struggles, weathering a
blending of families after Miryam's first husband has passed
away. Take the lovely piece called "The Blender" on p. 119
which begins with, "You are not my mother!" Read how she
sensitively deals with a teenage [excuse the term]
stepdaughter. "May I Call You Granny?" extends this theme.
Then there is making new friends, and an excellent piece on
shidduchim where she takes four women and discusses
their situations: two who are overqualified, the baalas
tshuvah and the working mother whose husband pitches in.
What pros and cons does she have to say about them?
Then there is adaptation from a point of growing strength.
Best expressed in the following, p. 19.
"Before I was married and became a mother, I was a teacher. I
made a mental list of things . . . of which I thoroughly
disapproved.
"I PROMISED MYSELF THAT MY CHILDREN WOULD NEVER GO TO SCHOOL
WITH DIRTY FINGERNAILS. [Caps are hers, in the book.]
Sometimes I just didn't get to do that chore on time.
"I WAS SURE THAT NO CHILD OF MINE WOULD EVER ARRIVE AT LUNCH
HOUR WITHOUT HIS PREPARED SANDWICH. (Ed. Haven't we all been
delinquent in this at some time?) . . .
"I WAS DETERMINED TO RAISE CHILDREN WHO WOULD NOT BE
CHUTZPADIK . . . AND SHAME THE FAMILY. Very, very
occasionally, I blush to admit, I had to visit a Rebbe or
teacher and apologize . . .
"I WAS ADAMANT THAT I WOULD BRING UP A BUNCH OF KIDS WHOSE
WATCHWORD WAS CHESSED. Boruch Hashem, on that one I didn't
stumble, and that makes up for all the other failures."
In passing, I would like to highlight this last one. Miryam
`volunteers' her son, her daughter-in-law and her car to the
Beged Yad LeYad clothing center network for two-car pickups
throughout Jerusalem on a DAILY volunteer basis. They are an
incredible team, this couple, an extension of her own
warmhearted nature.
And for a final tempter, a familiar scene and very seasonal
piece of not counting chickens before they are hatched (or
eggs after they are baked . . . ):
"Right after Pesach when the new flour came into the stores .
. . " Miryam baked up a storm and was left with one nice-
sized chocolate cake in her freezer. She builds dreams on
that cake, of serving unexpected guests, of an extra cake for
Ruthie's Bas Mitzva party or even lasting until Shavuos, to
be sliced sideways and filled with ice cream.
And guess what?
O.K., so you can guess, but better yet, read it (p. 100) and
read all the adorable, insightful essays before and after . .
.
And pray that Miryam decides to come back to YATED.
Taking this review full circle, I would like to encourage all
you potential writers out there to give it a try. Really, I
am very encouraging, very appreciative, try not to change too
much . . . You can even send handwritten specimens to:
Sheindel Weinbach, Panim Meirot 1, Jerusalem / FAX 02-
5382998 / email shyated@netvision.net.il We are all waiting
to see from you.
