I've decided that I am a "P.S." type of person.
What do I mean by that? Invariably, whether it is a phone
call or a conversation, when I've finished talking with
someone and I've already hung up or walked away, I
constantly, consistently, and inevitably think of something
else that I should have said, or that most definitely needed
to be clarified.
Which means that I have two choices: I can call the person
right back on the phone or run after them down the street, or
I can write myself a note to remember to tell the other
person, later, whatever it was that I wanted to say to
them.
The problem is that I hate little pieces of note paper. And
yet, my life is virtually inundated with them, everywhere.
(As I've always said before Pesach, the chessed of
HaShem is further demonstrated in the fact that, even though
trees are alive and constantly growing, paper is dead. Can
you only imagine if paper, which is made from trees, also
grew on its own?)
The frightening part about this need to add a P.S. to almost
every conversation, is that it happens both when I speak to
someone and even when I am writing to them.
My children and close friends already know to expect a phone-
back phone call from me after we've already hung up. I
imagine many of them stand around their phones for a minute
or two after hanging up from a phone call with me. But it's a
little more embarrassing when I've been speaking with a Rabbi
and/or a boss.
However, worst of all, is when I've been on the phone with
someone from a big company or a large beaurocracy, because
somehow I never remember to ask while I'm speaking to their
representative for the full name of the person with whom I am
conversing — which means that, even if I DO remember to
ask the name of the person with whom I'm discussing my water
bill, when I call back and ask for Miriam, I'm invariably
asked which one of the thirteen Miriams who work in that
office I want to speak with. Which is quite daunting, to say
the least.
I guess a letter or the e-mail business is probably even
worse, because, once that letter hits the mail chute, or I
hit that little "send" button, unlike a phone call in which I
can usually call back immediately and explain an issue, I can
end up having to spend twice as long clarifying the point in
writing that I had wanted to add, thus wasting double the
time that it took me to write the original epistle. The whole
business is just very frustrating and aggravating to me.
Yes, of course I always try to think of everything that I
need to say and/or answer in the letter, e-mail, phone call
or conversation before ending it. But it just doesn't seem to
work that way for me. After the fact, there is just
inevitably something else that I remember that I should have
said, or another "How could I possibly have forgotten to add
that . . .."
What I am trying to figure out is how general this P.S.
malady is. Are there others out there with the same need to
add a P.S. to most of the things they communicate? I
wonder.
And I wonder how I can learn to think of everything I need to
say before I hang up or walk away or drop that letter into
the mailbox.
And I wonder why I can't remember to think about what I want
to say before I start saying it. Because maybe that way, I'll
know what I need to say before I finish speaking.
