The ability to smile and laugh, amongst other things we hope,
distinguishes humans from animals. Animals do not have a
sense of humor. Maybe, although that is debatable, some well-
trained circus animals do have an understanding of fun, but
that is not humor. Animal lovers might claim that their dog
positively smiled one day, however, that is not really
factual. The laughing hyena doesn't laugh with mirth.
What is laughter? Physically, the body responds extensively
to laughter, which involves not only the muscles of the face,
but also of the chest and the stomach. More air is inhaled
into the lungs and blood vessels are enriched with extra
oxygen. The larynx emits different sounds from the tones in
which the person usually speaks. Emotionally, one feels a
sense of well-being after a good hearty laugh.
What amuses us or makes us laugh? Different cultures in
various countries each have their own sense of humor. Jews
have their own wry jokes and sense of humor, but those who
have been educated and lived in a given country for any
length of time tend to take on its sense of humor. In various
yeshivos and seminaries where the population is cosmopolitan,
this fact is quite obvious. On the whole, something absurd,
ridiculous or incongruous evokes a chuckle or a guffaw. The
unexpected, unusual or bizarre punch line of a story will
make us laugh.
Different things amuse different ages. A baby responds to a
smile in the first few weeks of life. He learns that if he
initiates the smile, he will get one in return. A little
later, a tickle or funny face or ridiculous sounds will evoke
not only a broad smile, but a hearty giggle. At this early
age, he will not always respond in the same way, especially
if he is hungry. Occasionally, he will lie in his crib and
smile to himself. Life feels good!
By six months, he will respond to non-physical stimulation.
An interesting mobile or a passing butterfly might elicit a
broad smile. Nevertheless, not all babies are over generous
with their smiles. Some seem to be born more serious, and
keep a dead-pan face most of the day. This does not mean that
they will not have a sense a humor later on in life. On the
contrary, as they grow older, they can have a class of thirty
children rolling around with merriment, while they themselves
look solemn. After a few incidents of this kind, teachers
begin to wonder who actually instigated this unseemly
behavior!
At the age of two, children can laugh loud and long about
nothing at all. Especially if there are two or more of the
same age. They can even deliberately begin to laugh so that
their friends will follow suit. If adults participate in the
abandoned laughter, their joy knows no bounds and they can
continue for hours. How many mothers have prophesied truly,
"It will end in tears"?
A sense of humor is something with which we are born, a
wonderful gift from Heaven. However, those who were not in
queue when humor was assigned, can develop it, too. There are
some staid members in jolly families who have to develop a
sense of humor in sheer self defense. One very intelligent
girl of eight commented, "I laugh because everyone else is
laughing, but I don't really get the joke." She will improve
her sense of the ridiculous as she matures, with help from
parents and siblings.
Every family has its own bon mots which are incomprehensible
to strangers. F.H.B. was used so often in a friend's family
when I was a child, that I repeatedly asked what it meant.
They never told me. After we were both married, the friend
confided in me that it meant, "Family, hold back." There was
only enough food for the visitors, and one of the parents
dropped these initials very frequently. This is not funny to
others, but in their family it was hilarious. Incidentally,
when members of the family get married and there are new
brothers- and sisters-in-law, it is kind to explain the
family jokes and maxims, even if they sound trite. They, in
turn, will explain their family's jokes to their spouses,
too.
Humor deflects many a potentially serious situation, even
when dealing with very small children. A little boy who has
fallen and just slightly grazed his knee, is crying
uncontrollably. Mother picks him up and gasps in mock shock.
"We had better call an ambulance immediately. And we need ten
doctors, at least!" By this time, the child is laughing, as
are the other children around.
A young man whose wife has just burnt a hole in his best
shirt can either explode in rage, in which case he will
probably receive as good as he gave. Or he can say, "You know
I always hated that shirt and was wondering how I could get
rid of it." His wife will say something equally flippant, and
will respect him all the more for his restraint and humor.
Usually, people with a sense of humor are well-liked and
accepted by their peers. Some people, both adults and
children, are blessed with a keen sense of humor. They can
tell a good joke, and understand all jokes, too, with one
proviso: they are unable to laugh at themselves. The fact
that they take themselves so seriously is a severe
disadvantage and does not stand them in good stead in their
social life.
Humor or laughter at another's expense is not humor. That is
self aggrandizement in an offensive form. When we watch
someone slip on a banana peel, and burst into laughter, that
is not funny, either. It is a gut reaction to the unexpected.
Other people have walked past the offending peel without
slipping; this unfortunate fellow fell. It is like the
unexpected punch line of a joke. Sometimes it isn't even so
funny, it is just unexpected.
Children howl with laughter at absurdities, which naturally
are banal at a later age. "Three children sliding on the ice
all on a summer's day; it so fell out they all fell in, the
rest -- they ran away," is a small example of the kind of
absurdities which amused young English children a century
ago, and still amuse them today. Puns, double meanings and a
play on words entertain older children.
Spontaneous laughter lightens the atmosphere in the home, and
relieves tension. Even a really sick person will probably
thrive on a joke. Jews who have had to laugh at themselves
through centuries of countless horrors, are known to be the
best comedians. There is a time and a place for humor, of
course, and part of growing up in a jocular home is to learn
when and when not to recount a joke, and when, indeed, to
stifle humor.
One Jewish joke for good measure:
In New York, a rabbi lost his hat in the wind. A young Irish
fellow ran, retrieved the hat and returned it to its
owner.
"May G-d bless you, young man. I thank you very much."
With the holy rabbi's blessing ringing in his ears, he
decided to try his luck at the races. He put his last $5 on
an outsider at 10 to 1, a horse called Trilby. Sure enough,
the horse won the race. The young fellow scanned the names of
the horses in the next race and found one called Homburg,
also an outsider. He put all of his winnings on "the hat" and
once again, his bet came in first. He betted on a Stetson and
a Bowler and numerous other hats, while his amazing luck held
good.
Finally, he went home and told his wife the story of how he
had retrieved the rabbi's hat and had received his
blessing.
"Well, where are the winnings?"
"It didn't work for the last one. I put all my money on a
horse called Chateau."
"Chateau means castle; you meant chapeau. Well, who won that
race?"
"Oh, some horse with a Japanese name. Yarmulka."
