"Mommy," said my eight year-old upon returning from
cheder, "right I come home last?" [Ed. This is second-
generation Anglo-Saxon `Hinglish' syntax.]
"Yes, you sure do."
"And right the girls come home before me?"
"Yes. That's right."
"And right they hang up their coats when they come home?"
No, I thought; I hang up their coats when they come
home. "That's right," I said.
"So," he said, "when I come home, there's no more room for
my coat!" He stood in front of the coat rack, flustered,
holding his coat.
"Aw, darling," I said, "there's room for everyone's coat in
our house. Here, let me see..." I confidently took his coat
while he marched happily to his room to check his bottle cap
collection, his sticker and stamp collection, battery
collection, key and coin collection, and to change socks.
By the time he'd done all this and returned, I was still
standing in front of the coat rack, wondering where in the
world to put his coat.
The coat rack is not my home's only site of overflowing
madness; I have at least two drawers of disorganization and
several closets of confusion.
But I don't mind that some things in my home don't have a
where. It's homey when sweaters and coats sit mushy and so
squishy-like on the coat rack. When one or two spill to the
floor, well, my coat rack runneth over.
As the saying goes: "Clutter is a bountiful sign of
abundance."
All right, you caught me: There is no such saying. But there
should be.
I know that there are many resourceful ways to create space;
this I have learned from my husband. He has this knack for
maneuvering eight frozen chickens into a freezer already
packed with ice cube trays, frozen fish, chopped turkey, soy
dogs, bread, Mr. Freezy's, sugar, flour, and leftover
soup.
I, on the other hand, was never any good at physics. I have
a hard time of it.
I have attended home management classes that help - but even
when I do my homework, there are times when it looks as
though I haven't.
I must add here an important point: While I don't know where
everything in the house belongs, I know exactly where
everything is.
My children, even the four and six year olds, have commented
on how perfectly tidy so- and-so's home is. They tell me
this, as they pat their little hands against their chests
and roll their eyes to the top of their heads. They don't
say it in a whiney, accusatory way; I trained them long ago
to believe that the reason why so-and-so's house is so neat
and tidy is because so-and-so's little ones all clean up
after themselves. The younger ones, at least, believe me.
My eleven year-old has her doubts. A few years ago she told
me that some mothers don't let their children play in the
house.
"You know what I noticed?" she said. "Those people have
really clean houses."
But that's not always the case. Many mothers who are
exceptional at parenting are also exceptional at
organization; it comes naturally.
Even those for whom organization does not come easy will
probably find it possible to switch to the Olga Organizer
Mode for certain occasions.
I used to host a class once a week and before the women
arrived, I'd clean. But I'd always leave one teacup on the
table and a small, neat pile of folded laundry, usually my
newest and prettiest towels, on the couch, so that no one
would know I had tried to get organized. They'd enter my
home and say, "How neat and lovely -- and it all comes so
naturally. Just look how she didn't even bother putting away
the teacup or laundry."
Many other silly techniques can be acquired in time through
one's own creativity. It's better to have the actual skills,
but in times of emergency, it can be faked.
"Mommy," my son said when he saw me still standing by the
coat rack, "why are you just standing there?"
"If you must know the truth," I said, "I also don't know
where to put your coat."
He gave me a funny look and smiled. "That's okay," he said.
"My coat doesn't mind." He sat down at the kitchen table and
bit hungrily into a juicy hot dog. With a full mouth and a
grin he added, "At least there's room for me!"
As long as there's a where for all the people -- there will
be few complaints about nowhere for the coats!
