Part III
We previously discussed how to focus our thoughts on
Torah ideas and Torah - orientation, like chessed. On having
short, interesting Torah insights "that can be said on the
go."
A perfect antidote for idle gossip, to say nothing of
malicious speech!
Recap: 1) Work at trying to always connect what is happening
to you and to others to thoughts about Torah, good middos
and Hashem.
2. Show love of Torah
* Smiling when hearing a Torah thought and, of course,
showing that you are paying attention, teaches a love of
Torah.
* A woman who attends shul for the Torah reading, even if
she cannot be there for the majority of the davening,
demonstrates a much deeper love for Torah than if she sends
the children off to shul alone so that she can spend another
half hour in bed. It also strengthens the other
participants' appreciation of shul and Torah: it's
depressing and demeaning to the Torah for only two or three
women to be in the women's section (imagine if you brought
in a guest that week). Of course, paying attention and not
speaking or handing out oif ruf peklach during the
Torah reading is mandatory.
* When a child returns from school, while hearing about his
day, ask extra questions about the Torah topics that were
studied. And be sure to show even more interest for
them than for the secular or non-Torah subjects.
If interest is shown in the child's discussion of what
Moishele or Miri said to the child or what the teacher said
or did to Yankele, but not equal or even more interest in
what was learned in parsha or novi,
unfortunate priorities are demonstrated. During a lull in
Torah talk at the table, mention the great Torah thought
that your Yaakov or Yehudis learned in school/gan
that week. If the child won't tell it over, you start, but
keep prompting him to finish, or ask, "Am I getting this
right?"
* Get up from your chair or stop whatever you were doing and
go over and kiss or hug your child when they tell you a
piece of Torah. And, verbally, tell them how happy it makes
you to hear them talking Torah -- whether you have already
heard the Torah thought or not. Remember that hearing a
dvar Torah one hundred times is not at all
like hearing it 101 times! Try not to answer the phone while
a child is speaking in Torah. If you must, immediately tell
the caller that the child is saying a dvar Torah and
you will call them back later. And hang up fast!
* Don't be lazy at the expense of Torah. If a child needs a
sefer or a notebook to get his limudei kodesh
homework right, make that extra effort to get up and find it
for him/her, even though we all know that children were
really `invented' to bring us things... When giving the
sefer to the child -- with a kiss or a smile to show
approval -- mention that it makes you happy to do this for
the sake of Torah. Also -- volunteer extra information and
look it up in a sefer to enrich their knowledge.
* Try to have Torah tapes playing when the children are
coming home. Let them see and hear that you enjoy spending
time listening to Torah when you are at home. Do remember to
close it when they come in so that you can talk with
them.
[Ed. SEFIRA time is the perfect time to join a Torah tape
lending library. They are listed in most chareidi
directories. There are separate ones for children with Torah
stories and messages. And if there isn't one in your
vicinity -- why not start one yourself? You'd be surprised
how many people would gladly donate the price of one or
several tapes (make that the membership fee)!]
To be continued...
