A MIND STAND
I have always been fascinated by the phrase, "Mishe'omad
al daato" which, being such a Jewishly spiritual concept,
has no accurate English translation. It roughly means: when a
person reached a stage of maturity, or became morally
conscious and aware.
When does this process begin?
Is it the first words of a baby? The first original thought?
The first conscious realization of ego?
Is it a daily occurrence? Each morning, when a person
suddenly discovers that he has awoken to a new day, that
Hashem has restored his soul -- and his personal identity --
so that he can begin another page in his individual life and
hope to make it count so that eventually, he can `come with
his days' -- does it happen at that very morning moment
before he gratefully gropes for the formula words to thank
Hashem: "Modeh ani lefonecha . . . "?
Does that `standing upon one's mind' denote a single flash of
enlightenment that changes one's life from an aimless
plodding to one of conscious purpose? Or is it a series of
lightning flashes of understanding and awakening into the
spheres of the spirit?
Is it the rebelliousness of adolescence against rigid
conventions he sees all around him and a vision for a braver
new world that he can hope to be part of by using the vigor
of youth to build upon the experience of age?
Ever since I heard the phrase, it has tickled my fancy and I
have longed to discuss its magic on paper. What better
opportunity than using it as a tribute to the very figure who
introduced it to me and who actually stood me on my mind, who
pulled off the blindfold of childhood, turned me round and
round and then figuratively shoved me in the right direction
and said, "This is the way of Torah. The straight and
narrow."
I was still standing on the one foot, emerging from the
eggshell, and beginning to search for my own identity and
looking around. I needed guidance and conviction and R'
Shlomo Rotenberg provided it custom-made. "Now go and learn
it -- and follow through."
EAST AND WEST
It was some forty-five years ago that I was exposed to the
unique figure of HaRav Shlomo Rotenberg zt'l, as a
neophyte in the Bais Yaakov high school on South Eighth St.,
Williamsburg, eager to learn, but with fighting spirit to
explore and make my own decisions, reach my own conclusions
and not become part of the fold, conform to the mold, without
a conscious coming-of-age. I still had to be introduced to
many concepts and values in Yiddishkeit which a
liberal day school upbringing had purposely failed to
provide: Hashgocho protis, daas Torah, mesirus nefesh,
ahavas Torah, yiras Shomayim and more.
At that point, there was a strict dividing line in my mind
between sacred and secular, with both sides fighting to win.
I was heavily addicted to reading, and still reading secular
books even on Shabbos. I was westernized in culture, and
coming to the Eastern European enclave of Bais Yaakov was a
culture shock that I was not ready to absorb without a
fight.
It was at that point that I became exposed to R' Rotenberg
through a six year course in Jewish history and occasional
lessons in Torah hashkofo. The sacred side of me was
duly impressed by the figures of the various Rebbetzin-
teachers, firsthand products of the Bais Yaakov movement in
Cracow, direct proteges of Sara Schenirer. And who couldn't
help feeling their spiritual impact? But that was on the
sacred side. And in my mind there still existed the
schismatic dichotomy of the secular world, separate and
apart. Who could bridge that?
Along came this dynamic teacher and thinker who, for me,
represented something of the western world which I still
kowtowed to. He proceeded to debunk all of its values, and
replace them with the crystal sparkle of pure Torah values,
with the skill of sleight of mind -- bombshells that exploded
all the myths and mythologies, Greek and otherwise, that I
had read and absorbed through hundreds of books, sort-of
kosher by the standards of those days.
He came to class with no more than a sheaf of closely written
pages, the painstaking labor of years of meticulous research,
and here-and-there, removed the pin of some thought-grenade
releasing fireworks of controversy that shook the very
foundations of our bourgeois upbringing.
GENERATION OF SECURITY
Ours was the generation of security, the post-Holocaust
people determined to survive. In relative comfort. To make
the best of the golden opportunities of the liberal
Goldene Medina which promised freedom from racial
discrimination (read: antisemitism), and a fair chance to
all. The generation of "My son, the doctor; my son, the
lawyer." And what was to stop me from becoming "My daughter,
the (secular) journalist/ writer/ translator"? Lack of
opportunity? Lack of skill? Lack of secular education?
The battle for Shabbos had already been won, and those who
had survived it were, more or less, safe. The battle for
kashrus had also been won, and you could be an
orthodox Jew without too much sacrifice, in middle class
comfort.
The battle was pitched against college, secular education,
bourgeois complacency in Yiddishkeit. It was the
battle of Torah: R' Aharon Kotler's crusade for Jewish boys,
and on the distaff side, no less vehement, the campaign of R'
Boruch and Rebbetzin Kaplan for the Jewish girls who would
establish the homes of the coming generation.
SHIVTI BEVEIS HASHEM
The concept of shivti, kol yomov, of casting aside all
of those trappings and living purely for the sake of Torah,
was foreign to America in those days, all the more so to a
Belgian transplant of a family of upper class diamond
dealers. The money had been left behind, to be sure, and we
struggled for our daily subsistence, but the `class' still
existed, perpetuated by a gaggle of Tantes who were
continually spouted tachlis and higher education.
Torah? Leave that for Shabbos, at best.
R' Rotenberg was a five star general. A very product of that
Belgian society, he had rejected it. He was over and beyond
it. His were the eyes of Bar Yochai who could subsist on
miracles in an everyday existence, a R' Chanina ben Dosa who
was even beyond miracles. He aimed to teach us that we Jewish
daughters could turn vinegar to oil -- and to think nothing
of it!
Today, every three year old Rivky and Chanale know the story
and its full impact is somewhat lost. To us, Rebbetzin Ben
Dosa, Mrs. Rochel Akiva, Rebbetzin Bruriya, wife of R' Meir,
were all presented as women living a viable Torah life that
actually appealed in its poverty, motivation, direction, pure
devotion.
ANGEL'S ADVOCATE
R' Rotenberg was the angel's advocate. He made everything
come alive with panoramic vigor and beauty. It was heady
stuff, rich wine, and I don't know how he managed to do it,
injecting it into those vintage, yellowed pages of history
that leaped to life, lesson after lesson.
We looked forward to those lessons each week. To what concept
would we be introduced this time? How would we be able to
defend ourselves against his onslaught of logic, facts,
perspective? At what point would we capitulate? At what point
would we suddenly `stand on our minds' and incorporate a
major new value into our life system?
I was the product of Reader's Digest, Life magazine,
and books. When it came to subjects like evolution, I
couldn't help nursing a reserved respect for the pictures and
the `facts.' Along came R' Rotenberg and debunked it all, but
from a scientific vantage. He ridiculed the `Missing Link'
and disproved the currently popular notions in their own
language.
And we were duly impressed. Very much so, in fact. I might
even say that he was our missing link, our bridge from east
to west, from profane to sacred, from middle CRASS mediocrity
to the pure and otherworldly. He put down the American golden
calf of money and skillfully replaced it with golden crown of
Torah. Lesson by lesson.
And it eventually penetrated. Poverty, simplicity, austerity -
- became values onto themselves. A prodigious feat for those
times. Indeed, he introduced the very word `histapkus'
to my lexicon, perhaps a reality in our home of necessity,
but completely foreign as a positive value.
Today, it is a household word. Eretz Yisroel society, and
kollel society in the diaspora, is based on the very
values that were so novel and alien to us then. I am certain
that he played a very pivotal role in producing generations
of girls who established homes with a solid appreciation for
Torah, and if some of us still had a foot in the business
world, at least the next generation went forward in the right
direction. The Jewish world today, fifty years later, is
bigger and better for the principles he taught to hundreds of
us, and which we avidly absorbed.
I, personally, am convinced that my values in life, my goals
and my lifestyle, directly reflect on a daily basis what I
was taught by this unforgettable teacher, and I will forever
be grateful to him for his having stood me on my mind.
