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Home
and Family
"Harbei Nachas"
by M. Steinberg
When my first son was born, along with all the wishes for
Mazel Tov, many people wished me Harbei Nachas.
I was much too busy with diapers and feeding to enjoy this
precious commodity. Along came his sister, another brother in
short order, and many more wishes that "You should see much
nachas in the future." What nachas? The
responsibilites were just about overwhelming: children, jobs,
moving from one home to another, making aliya and
getting settled, a few Sabra children, other jobs. Who had
time to think? Who had time to indulge in the commodity
called nachas?
I remember bar- and bas-mitzvos made under
pressure: emotional and physical. Along came a string of
weddings made under pressure: emotional, physical and
financial! What nachas? It all sped by at a high-
speed blur.
One daughter had an eighth grade graduation which I attended
with an eight- day-old baby in my arms. Who could enjoy her
solo? I was out in the hall most of the time. There were
other similar events when the program dragged on longer than
planned and my thoughts would be on what was going on at
home. Were the other children eating? Getting bathed? Were
they safe from unexpected emergencies? Should I leave early?
Wouldn't the child performing be hurt if I left before the
end? But - what was going on at home? There were times when I
had to send the oldest children to attend a kindergarten
graduation or siddur celebration in proxy. When was I
supposed to reap all this nachas they everyone kept
wishing on me?
Then, recently, one late afternoon, which we used to call the
`crazy hour', I attended a siyum Chumosh Bereishis in
my grandson's cheder. I had no babies with me. No one
would go hungry if I wasn't home in time for supper. I
listened to him chanting the chumosh and was sure I
could distinguish his sweet voice from among the rest. I
heard every word of the menahel's dvar Torah. I
looked to my hearts content at his freckled face grinning at
me from the makeshift stage. By the end of the program, I was
swimming in tears: tears of emotion, happiness and genuine
nachas.
I finally discovered the answer to my question. When you
receive the blessing that begins with the mazel tovs
on the arrival of your first child and keeps repeating itself
through years and occasions of simchas, the seeds of
blessing and joy are sown. With your grandchildren, you reap
the harvest, and from them - your children's children - you
get to enjoy that elusive commodity -
Harbei Nachas!
[Ed. The test of a real Bubbie - one who can sit unfidgiting
through twenty- five soloists at a chumash
celebration, introducing themselves in singsong to Rebbe
Alter's musical accompaniment as `I am now five years old and
I am beginning to learn chumash and my name is so-and-
so' - and then feel her heart overflowing with pride when it
is her grandson's turn.]
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