Yanky, Moishie, get up, it's terribly late. Channa, Miriam, Esther, you'll miss the school bus. No, not another five minutes. Get up NOW.
"I can't find my shoe." " I don't want to wear this skirt today." "My blouse isn't ironed . . . ." "I have no time for breakfast." "I need a note." "We have to bring two empty cornflakes boxes for today.."
Is this your good morning?
In far too many homes, mornings are a nightmare. The little ones, who go to bed early, wake up accordingly, long before anyone else, and start playing as if they had all day. Even if they do not go to sleep early, many of them somehow seem to jump out of bed bright-eyed and full of joy. By the time Mommy gets up, the toys are scattered all over the floor and the room looks as if it had never been tidy... The older children who go to bed too late, would like nothing better than a few more hours' sleep. They do not feel any responsibility for the smooth running of the house — that's what mothers are for. They might help to dress the babies, but are usually rushed, which causes the babies to behave badly. Besides, a two-year-old may decide that only Mommy is good enough to dress her.
If Mother does not go out to work, she can sit down and relax for a few minutes after the bedlam, and then begin the morning's work. However, if she, too, has a deadline and has to be out of the house early, this is a disastrous beginning of her day. One baby sitter reported that a certain baby arrived each day still wearing his diaper from the night. Some children have not had their hair brushed and do not look as well-groomed as the mother would like them to be, which adds to her distress at the start of the day.
Not everybody is well organized, and some people are incapable of planning ahead, in spite of good intentions. However, if a mother can sit down at night when the children are in pajamas, (if it is a disorganized household, the children will not be going to bed as soon as they are told), and go through a check list, it will eliminate much of the chaos. Get the clothes ready for the children at night. Those self willed toddlers who have definite opinions about their wardrobe, should be involved with the choice. This obviates the tantrum of not wanting a particular garment. Older children must prepare their own clothes for the morning and put their shoes in the same place as the other clothes. Maybe they could do this at the same time while they are helping you with the young ones.
Even in the most organized households, single shoes mysteriously disappear during the night. Unless the mother is organized, and sews on buttons when she sorts, folds or irons the laundry, lack of a button or a torn seam may be a cause for panic in the morning. Ask each child individually if he has done his homework. Where is it? Suggest that they put their satchels in one particular place, ready for the morning, out of reach of little fingers. Little ones are frequently the cause of problems if they have had a long afternoon nap and are up late at night. All too often, school children declare that they really had all their equipment, but Baby tipped out the satchel at night.
Individual attention at night is essential. Questions such as 'does anyone need a note', are not likely to elicit any response, 'the question was not addressed to me'! The more you can do in the evening, the more relaxed your morning will be. If your children take a packed lunch, this too can be prepared at night and kept in the fridge.
Not all families are spread out in age; each family is individual. Thus, there are not always older siblings to help with the little ones. Furthermore, children in the same family differ vastly in the natures. Some like to take their time in getting dressed and cannot tolerate being rushed, as it makes them even slower. Others do things quickly and efficiently without any prompting.
When she tries to reorganize her morning's schedule, a mother has to reckon on enough time for even the slow ones. Besides which, unforeseen things can and do happen in the best of homes. The afore mentioned missing button, or perhaps an accident a child had at night, requiring a shower before getting dressed, or a toddler who has decided to be contrary that morning.
All this is basic, and just plain common sense. Nevertheless, there are mothers who declare that however much they try, this will not work for them. The truth is, that there is one essential part of the reorganization. Mother has to be up before the children. Whether she goes out to work or not, her own day must be organized before she wakes the family. But what if she is a night bird? What if she is one of those people who stay up most of the night because they cannot work when the children are around? A woman whose children were late for school regularly, came up against a new Head teacher, who threatened to send children home if they were late more than once a month. The parents were notified about this new rule, and the guilty ones knew that she would carry out her threat. Much against her inclinations, this woman decided to change her life style. She reported that the whole atmosphere in the house was changed because of the more relaxed mornings, and that she personally felt so much better all day.
Like adults, some children are also night birds by nature. Others have difficulty in falling asleep, or are such light sleepers that any small sound wakes them. Whatever the reason, these children are difficult to waken in the mornings. Moreover, children copy their parents and if they see that Mother stays up half the night and has dark circles under her eyes, constantly complaining of fatigue, they will reason that in spite of what she says, it is all right to go without the required amount of sleep.
This is reason enough to try to change your life style, and to go to bed on time, in order not to deprive yourself of sleep. Things which sound so simple are often extremely difficult to achieve. The best laid plans can go awry where there are unpredictable little children. Moreover, if this is the way the family has been functioning for ten years, if the mornings have been chaotic for seven of those ten years, it will be extremely difficult to change. However, if a woman tries the new method for just one week, and sees how beneficial it is to the whole family, how happily the children leave home in the mornings, she may make a greater effort. She may not always succeed, but even fifty percent of pleasant relaxed mornings, is better than constant chaos.
