Paying condolence calls, nichum aveilim, to parents
sitting in mourning for a child, is a very emotionally
draining undertaking. Mourning of this sort is not the normal
kind of event in this world, and even outsiders find it most
difficult to digest suffering such as this. How much more
difficult it is to find the suitable words to attempt to
comfort, to bring solace to those mourners.
Sometimes, one of the visitors is a great person who knows
how to present a spiritual, positive explanation to the
enigma of the soul descending earthward for a specified time
period, returning afterwards to its Divine origin in what
seems the prime of life, leaving in its wake parents in shock
who feel they forfeited the chance to reap nachas from
that child.
When I saw R' Eliyohu amongst the comforters, I thought that
now we would hear some significant words of consolation
steeped in emunah, as is his wont in such situations.
But this time he remained silent and did not utter a word.
When he got up to go, he uttered the accepted verse of
consolation and left together with the person who had
accompanied him. I exited immediately afterwards, which
enabled me to hear the conversation that took place between
them as they descended the stairs.
"I thought you'd say some words of condolence to the bereaved
parents," said R' Eliyohu's companion, in a tone that gently
wondered at his failing to do so, as was his custom in such
sad circumstances.
R' Eliyohu did not react. He thought a moment, then asked his
friend, "Did you notice the mezuzoh on the door
leading from the room to the porch?"
His friend made a mental effort but finally replied, "No, I
really didn't notice. But what connection is there between
the mezuzoh and your object of offering
condolence?"
R' Eliyohu did not say anything at first. At his age,
descending the stairs is no easy feat. Only when he had
reached the main landing did he stop to lean on the banister
and then say in amazement, "You ask what is the connection? A
Jew who recites the Shema every day asks such a
question? Hashem tells us explicitly in the Torah `And you
shall write them upon the doorposts of your house . . . so
that your days and the days of your sons increase'! That's
the connection!
"This is not a special segulah for extraordinary
people. It is no esoteric kabbalistic secret and not a
custom for people of exalted stature. Rather, it is an
explicit dictum in the Torah, addressed to every Jew who
seeks life. The Mechabber of the Shulchon
Oruch, the Code of Law for the daily conduct of every
single Jew, tells us regarding the commandment of
mezuzoh that one must, `be most heedful of it, and
whoever is careful regarding it shall live long, and the days
of his children will also be extended accordingly. And if he
is not careful in it, they will be shortened.' It is
frightening! But now I can tell you that between the room
where we sat and the porch -- there was no mezuzoh,
whatsoever."
The man was flabbergasted. I heard the conversation while
standing behind them on the staircase. I descended and joined
them. R' Eliyohu and I daven in the same shul,
and I allowed myself the liberty to join the conversation.
"Sholom, R' Eliyohu," I said. "I couldn't help
overhearing what you just said. Do you mean to say that the
lack of a mezuzoh is the reason why this couple's son
passed away in his youth?"
"G-d forbid!" R' Eliyohu hastened to assure me. "Do you
imagine I peeked into the ledgers of the Heavenly Court? I
cannot draw a direct correlation between a sin and its
punishment. Only a prophet is able to do that. I can only
note the warning on the one hand, and the tragedy on the
other. There are so many other factors to be taken into
account, just as there may very well be certain merits that
forestall a punishment coming to them because of the lack of
the mezuzoh."
R' Eliyohu than turned to his companion and asked, "Do you
understand? My mouth was stopped up at the moment I noticed
the lack of the mezuzoh. Had I uttered a single word
about it I would have caused tremendous pain to the mourners,
as if pinning the blame upon them for the direct punishment.
I had come to comfort them, after all, and not, G-d forbid,
to hurt them and add insult to injury. But I was incapable of
saying a single thing in view of that porch doorway that
stared me in the face, devoid as it was of an explicit
commandment which has more than a hint to the cause of their
bereavement."
I had, to be sure, studied the laws of mezuzoh more
than once, but R' Eliyohu's harsh, stark declaration struck a
deep fear in my heart. I quickly went through all the
doorways of my own apartment in my mind, from the entrance to
the back porch, and calmed down somewhat as I distinctly
recalled affixing the mezuzas upon them in the evening
of our moving into the apartment. I have nothing to worry
about, I reassured myself.
R' Eliyohu scanned the large entrance to the building. His
eyes were drawn to the door at the far end of the expanse.
"Do you see that doorway?" he asked. "I have no idea what
lies behind it. Perhaps it is some private storeroom
belonging to one of the tenants here. Perhaps it is a shared
storeroom for bicycles and carriages. I have no idea if its
size actually warrants a mezuzoh or if it may be
absolved of the obligation of a mezuzoh. Each case
requires the attention of its particular owner, single or
collective, and a halachic question of a reliable authority
where there is any question. Some entrance ways require a
mezuzoh, others don't. Some do require a
mezuzoh, but it must be affixed without a
brochoh. All this needs clarification on the part of
the residents who are responsible for any joint property in
the building where they live.
"See over there? There's a glass door leading to the parking
lot. What is your opinion? Does it require a
mezuzoh?"
Before we even had a chance to reply, R' Eliyohu began
quoting, "`Upon the door posts of your house and your gates.'
Did you notice? `Gates' is in the plural form. It is not
sufficient for mezuzas to be affixed to the entrance
of your house, but it must also be placed upon the gate that
leads to the house and sometimes, a house has more than one
gateway. All the additional gates require a mezuzoh.
See here, the doorway from the parking lot to the lobby of
the building is an additional entrance or gateway to the
apartments in this building and it, too, is obligated with a
mezuzoh. Come, let us examine it."
We went over to the glass door and opened it. We did see a
mezuzoh on the outside of the doorway leading to the
parking lot, but we immediately saw that its kashrus was
questionable. The lower nail in the mezuzoh had become
loose and the mezuzoh was dangling from the upper nail
which was still intact.
"This is called a mezuzoh teluya," determined R'
Eliyohu. "Furthermore, take a look up there. There's no roof
and the winter rains fall upon the mezuzoh. If it is
not well insulated, one drop penetrating inside is enough to
ruin the parchment, blot the ink and invalidate it
altogether. The responsibility for this mezuzoh lies
upon all the residents of this building, just as the merit of
this mitzvah, if done properly, would serve as
protection for all the residents.
"Chazal say that a mezuzoh guards a home from danger
and harm. The Shulchan Oruch also categorically states
that this protection is to be considered an overt miracle.
While the most `heavyweight' mitzvos only provide protection
for a person when he is occupied in doing them, the mitzvah
of mezuzoh protects a home without any further action
required of the person, even when he is asleep. But all this
only holds true, to be sure, if the commandment is performed
in a halachically correct fashion and only for the one who is
heedful of it.
"A heedful attitude towards this commandment begins when one
buys the mezuzoh. The savings of several
shekolim in the purchase of a cheaper mezuzoh
is not fitting. It detracts from the superlative nature, the
hiddur mitzvah. It is also not particularly thrifty
when one takes into consideration the fact that it is meant
to last for dozens of years. Showing due respect to the
mitzvah of mezuzoh also entails not placing a baby on
a potty near one or putting smelly garbage in the doorway
since it bears the holy Name of Hashem. Neglect and oversight
of places in the apartment, or in the building, which require
a mezuzoh also do not conform to the caution one
should practice towards this mitzvah."
When R' Eliyohu said the last sentence, my complacency
towards this mitzvah was suddenly shaken. Several questions
surfaced in my mind: What was the halocho regarding
the shelter in our cooperatively owned building? What about
the roof? Did the doorways to them require a mezuzoh?
What about the former garbage room which was eventually
converted to a storeroom? Do all these places require a
mezuzoh? I tried to ask R' Eliyohu these questions but
he refused to reply.
"You have a neighborhood rov and there are botei
horo'oh which will give you a ruling over the phone, as
well. Let me wish you long life, my friend, to you and your
children. And protection from all kinds of harm. It's worth
all the trouble."
