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30 Nissan 5764 - April 21, 2004 | Mordecai Plaut, director Published Weekly
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Opinion & Comment
So That Your Days Increase

by Yochonon Dovid

Paying condolence calls, nichum aveilim, to parents sitting in mourning for a child, is a very emotionally draining undertaking. Mourning of this sort is not the normal kind of event in this world, and even outsiders find it most difficult to digest suffering such as this. How much more difficult it is to find the suitable words to attempt to comfort, to bring solace to those mourners.

Sometimes, one of the visitors is a great person who knows how to present a spiritual, positive explanation to the enigma of the soul descending earthward for a specified time period, returning afterwards to its Divine origin in what seems the prime of life, leaving in its wake parents in shock who feel they forfeited the chance to reap nachas from that child.

When I saw R' Eliyohu amongst the comforters, I thought that now we would hear some significant words of consolation steeped in emunah, as is his wont in such situations. But this time he remained silent and did not utter a word. When he got up to go, he uttered the accepted verse of consolation and left together with the person who had accompanied him. I exited immediately afterwards, which enabled me to hear the conversation that took place between them as they descended the stairs.

"I thought you'd say some words of condolence to the bereaved parents," said R' Eliyohu's companion, in a tone that gently wondered at his failing to do so, as was his custom in such sad circumstances.

R' Eliyohu did not react. He thought a moment, then asked his friend, "Did you notice the mezuzoh on the door leading from the room to the porch?"

His friend made a mental effort but finally replied, "No, I really didn't notice. But what connection is there between the mezuzoh and your object of offering condolence?"

R' Eliyohu did not say anything at first. At his age, descending the stairs is no easy feat. Only when he had reached the main landing did he stop to lean on the banister and then say in amazement, "You ask what is the connection? A Jew who recites the Shema every day asks such a question? Hashem tells us explicitly in the Torah `And you shall write them upon the doorposts of your house . . . so that your days and the days of your sons increase'! That's the connection!

"This is not a special segulah for extraordinary people. It is no esoteric kabbalistic secret and not a custom for people of exalted stature. Rather, it is an explicit dictum in the Torah, addressed to every Jew who seeks life. The Mechabber of the Shulchon Oruch, the Code of Law for the daily conduct of every single Jew, tells us regarding the commandment of mezuzoh that one must, `be most heedful of it, and whoever is careful regarding it shall live long, and the days of his children will also be extended accordingly. And if he is not careful in it, they will be shortened.' It is frightening! But now I can tell you that between the room where we sat and the porch -- there was no mezuzoh, whatsoever."

The man was flabbergasted. I heard the conversation while standing behind them on the staircase. I descended and joined them. R' Eliyohu and I daven in the same shul, and I allowed myself the liberty to join the conversation.

"Sholom, R' Eliyohu," I said. "I couldn't help overhearing what you just said. Do you mean to say that the lack of a mezuzoh is the reason why this couple's son passed away in his youth?"

"G-d forbid!" R' Eliyohu hastened to assure me. "Do you imagine I peeked into the ledgers of the Heavenly Court? I cannot draw a direct correlation between a sin and its punishment. Only a prophet is able to do that. I can only note the warning on the one hand, and the tragedy on the other. There are so many other factors to be taken into account, just as there may very well be certain merits that forestall a punishment coming to them because of the lack of the mezuzoh."

R' Eliyohu than turned to his companion and asked, "Do you understand? My mouth was stopped up at the moment I noticed the lack of the mezuzoh. Had I uttered a single word about it I would have caused tremendous pain to the mourners, as if pinning the blame upon them for the direct punishment. I had come to comfort them, after all, and not, G-d forbid, to hurt them and add insult to injury. But I was incapable of saying a single thing in view of that porch doorway that stared me in the face, devoid as it was of an explicit commandment which has more than a hint to the cause of their bereavement."

I had, to be sure, studied the laws of mezuzoh more than once, but R' Eliyohu's harsh, stark declaration struck a deep fear in my heart. I quickly went through all the doorways of my own apartment in my mind, from the entrance to the back porch, and calmed down somewhat as I distinctly recalled affixing the mezuzas upon them in the evening of our moving into the apartment. I have nothing to worry about, I reassured myself.

R' Eliyohu scanned the large entrance to the building. His eyes were drawn to the door at the far end of the expanse. "Do you see that doorway?" he asked. "I have no idea what lies behind it. Perhaps it is some private storeroom belonging to one of the tenants here. Perhaps it is a shared storeroom for bicycles and carriages. I have no idea if its size actually warrants a mezuzoh or if it may be absolved of the obligation of a mezuzoh. Each case requires the attention of its particular owner, single or collective, and a halachic question of a reliable authority where there is any question. Some entrance ways require a mezuzoh, others don't. Some do require a mezuzoh, but it must be affixed without a brochoh. All this needs clarification on the part of the residents who are responsible for any joint property in the building where they live.

"See over there? There's a glass door leading to the parking lot. What is your opinion? Does it require a mezuzoh?"

Before we even had a chance to reply, R' Eliyohu began quoting, "`Upon the door posts of your house and your gates.' Did you notice? `Gates' is in the plural form. It is not sufficient for mezuzas to be affixed to the entrance of your house, but it must also be placed upon the gate that leads to the house and sometimes, a house has more than one gateway. All the additional gates require a mezuzoh. See here, the doorway from the parking lot to the lobby of the building is an additional entrance or gateway to the apartments in this building and it, too, is obligated with a mezuzoh. Come, let us examine it."

We went over to the glass door and opened it. We did see a mezuzoh on the outside of the doorway leading to the parking lot, but we immediately saw that its kashrus was questionable. The lower nail in the mezuzoh had become loose and the mezuzoh was dangling from the upper nail which was still intact.

"This is called a mezuzoh teluya," determined R' Eliyohu. "Furthermore, take a look up there. There's no roof and the winter rains fall upon the mezuzoh. If it is not well insulated, one drop penetrating inside is enough to ruin the parchment, blot the ink and invalidate it altogether. The responsibility for this mezuzoh lies upon all the residents of this building, just as the merit of this mitzvah, if done properly, would serve as protection for all the residents.

"Chazal say that a mezuzoh guards a home from danger and harm. The Shulchan Oruch also categorically states that this protection is to be considered an overt miracle. While the most `heavyweight' mitzvos only provide protection for a person when he is occupied in doing them, the mitzvah of mezuzoh protects a home without any further action required of the person, even when he is asleep. But all this only holds true, to be sure, if the commandment is performed in a halachically correct fashion and only for the one who is heedful of it.

"A heedful attitude towards this commandment begins when one buys the mezuzoh. The savings of several shekolim in the purchase of a cheaper mezuzoh is not fitting. It detracts from the superlative nature, the hiddur mitzvah. It is also not particularly thrifty when one takes into consideration the fact that it is meant to last for dozens of years. Showing due respect to the mitzvah of mezuzoh also entails not placing a baby on a potty near one or putting smelly garbage in the doorway since it bears the holy Name of Hashem. Neglect and oversight of places in the apartment, or in the building, which require a mezuzoh also do not conform to the caution one should practice towards this mitzvah."

When R' Eliyohu said the last sentence, my complacency towards this mitzvah was suddenly shaken. Several questions surfaced in my mind: What was the halocho regarding the shelter in our cooperatively owned building? What about the roof? Did the doorways to them require a mezuzoh? What about the former garbage room which was eventually converted to a storeroom? Do all these places require a mezuzoh? I tried to ask R' Eliyohu these questions but he refused to reply.

"You have a neighborhood rov and there are botei horo'oh which will give you a ruling over the phone, as well. Let me wish you long life, my friend, to you and your children. And protection from all kinds of harm. It's worth all the trouble."


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