Opinion & Comment
A Middos Workshop: Bitochon

Part II

The first part noted that bitochon is the primary lesson of Succos and unwavering trust in Hashem brings us true joy. The Chazon Ish explains that bitochon is the practical manifestation of our internal emunah which is based on three principles: 1] No one is more concerned with my well-being than merciful Hashem; 2] no one is more fair to me than Hashem; 3] Hashem is always involved in our lives. Fantasy prevents us from fully integrating these principles in our lives, but they are always true, even if Hashem's presence is hidden. We should view our suffering and hardship as kaporoh or nisoyon and not as useless pain, thereby increasing our trust in Hashem.

Bitochon vs. Hishtadlus

"By the sweat of your brow you shall eat bread." Before Odom Horishon's sin, he had no need to do any work. The trees provided fruits, and the mal'ochim served him meat. If not for Odom Horishon's fateful curse, a person could sit and do nothing and be fully sustained. But the fact is that since the sin, one is obligated to perform some level of effort or hishtadlus to provide for his needs. Ramchal explains that the efforts we make are like a tax we must pay in order to receive benefits.

Often the effort we make has no link with the results. We may make hishtadlus in one area, but the outcome comes from a completely different direction. Whatever Hashem decrees will undoubtedly happen, but we must do our part and pay our tax. We are basically obligated to make some form of hishtadlus -- but of course, why would one pay more taxes than he has to!

The classic example of minimal hishtadlus is the mon, the wonder bread of the Jews in the wilderness. For tzaddikim the mon fell right at their doorstep. For those on a slightly lower level, the mon fell in the middle of the camp, so they had to walk to get it. For others it was at the end of the camp, and yet others had to actually go outside of the camp.

HaRav Schneur Kotler zt'l explained that each person's efforts depended on how much he believed he was expected to do. With their full trust in Hashem's kindness, the tzaddikim believed that Hashem expected them to go no more than to the front of their tent in order to receive His gift. Individuals on a lower level felt they had to make more significant efforts. They pointed to the posuk, "by the sweat of your brow" (Bereishis 3:19) and felt they had to make more hishtadlus. Some people felt they must exert major efforts to receive their daily sustenance, so they walked all the way out of the camp for their mon portion.

This is our reality too. Each of us has a different sense of how much Hashem expects of us. Many fail to see their obligation to make an effort as merely a tax and view it as reality, an uncompromising principle. Some, however, make the most minimal effort possible. For example, to prepare for retirement one great rabbi made one good basic financial investment and left the rest up to Hashem. That was enough for him.

In Tehillim (3:6) Dovid Hamelech says, "I lay down and went to sleep and awoke, because Hashem will support me." The Brisker Rov questioned this statement. What new point is Dovid Hamelech making when he informs us that he went to sleep at night?

In explanation, the Brisker Rov defended his peculiar conduct while taking cover in a bomb shelter during the war. With bombs flying over his head, he put on his night apparel and lay down to sleep. In his companions' nervous state, they could not believe that one could sleep at such a precarious time.

The Brisker Rov explained that one is obligated to do hishtadlus by entering the bomb shelter and that after that point, where no more hishtadlus could be done, the mitzva of bitochon comes into play. He explained that one's obligation at that point is to place his full trust in Hashem and confidently await His salvation. All we are expected to do is make a reasonable effort.

Dovid Hamelech's life was hanging in the balance, but he had done all that he could. After that point, he was expected to place his full trust in Hashem and calmly lie down to sleep. So, Dovid Hamelech did so and tells us that he actually fell asleep because he totally trusted in Hashem to support and protect him.

If one becomes panic-stricken when facing a particular situation because he feels that he is not in control, this indicates that he believes that he should be in control. This is the time to let go and realize that Hashem has the control.

Too Much Hishtadlus

When is effort too much effort?

Rebbetzin Esther Segal o.b.m. was diagnosed with a fatal illness. After trying every possible avenue, the doctors recommended trying an experimental drug. Rebbetzin Segal decided that she preferred to have faith in Hashem rather than an experimental drug. As the nurses gave her pills to take, she discreetly placed them in a bag under her bed. The doctors were astounded with the success of their newly-discovered drug! After she miraculously recovered, the entire medical staff gathered in her room to marvel at their success. At that point she revealed her secret and gave credit to the True Healer.

Rebbetzin Segal probably based her decision on the Chazon Ish's insight not to take desperate measures. If our efforts seem strange or excessive, then they probably are. That is the time to rely on Hashem rather than to despair.

The Chazon Ish cites Yosef Hatzaddik's actions as proof for this point. In the famous conversation between Yosef Hatzaddik and the butler who was leaving prison, Yosef asked him to remember him and not to forget him. For Yosef, this request was considered excessive hishtadlus. The promise of the Sar Hamashkim was like a politician's campaign promise--not something to be relied on. Yosef was held accountable for his unreasonable effort, and therefore Hashem made the butler forget.

The relationship between hishtadlus and bitochon is complicated. The Ramchal says that we have to make some sort of effort, but we should keep in mind that it is not our hishtadlus that brings the results. We should not be surprised when our efforts do not work out or when our desired outcome comes from some other source.

A certain rosh yeshiva once said that he makes sincere efforts in fundraising, but is not disappointed when they do not seem to bear fruit. He explained that he did his part and Hashem will do the rest. Hashem undoubtedly wants his yeshiva to succeed, so it will certainly happen some way or another. He added that when he returned home, he always received unexpected funds that successfully completed his campaign.

Bitochon and Tefilloh

Another form of hishtadlus is prayer. Sometimes, when our physical efforts are to no avail, this means that it is time to turn to Hashem in prayer. But this raises a fundamental question about bitochon and hishtadlus. Although prayer does not involve physical efforts, we are engaging ourselves in attempts to change our present situation.

Now, we are familiar with the concept of gam zu letovoh, everything is for the good. If so, where is there room for prayer? Should we not just accept our circumstances as they are? In other words, is prayer denying our belief that Hashem knows what is best for us?

To answer these questions, we must examine the purposes of tefilloh. First of all, when we find ourselves in an uncomfortable predicament, we must address the possibility that Hashem placed us there for one purpose: so that we will daven. In parshas Toldos, Chazal ask why the foremothers were all born barren? If their mission was to be the matriarchs of the Jewish people, why were they created physically incapable of having children?

Chazal answer, "Hakodosh Boruch Hu mis'aveh letefilloson shel tzaddikim," Hashem craves the prayers of tzaddikim. Now, we know that Hashem does not need our praise, so there must be greater meaning to this Chazal.

Hashem loves His children's prayers not because it is good for Him, but because it is good for them. Hashem wants our relationship with Him to flourish. To fulfill their role as forebears of the Jewish nation, the Imohos had to have an extremely close relationship with Hashem, and tefilloh accomplished just that. Sara Imeinu davened for years and years until her prayers broke through the Gates of Mercy, and for this she merited Yitzchok. Sometimes, Hashem sets up life predicaments just for us to pour our hearts out to Him.

Another purpose of tefilloh is that it may be one of the ingredients of the experience itself. This means that sometimes middas hadin dictates that we be placed in a certain difficult situation. In such cases, Chazal tell us that someone who sees a hardship coming on him should examine his deeds. In response to one's misdeeds, Hashem often sends yissurim, to arouse a person to do teshuva. These yissurim point out issues one may otherwise overlook. Once he realizes his mistakes and corrects them, he can hope for Hashem's rachamim. In this case, prayer is the catalyst to evoke that rachamim.

A third purpose of prayer is that at times we do not fully experience the bounty we receive, because we fail to recognize the Source of that good. One may take this good for granted, which defeats the purpose of Hashem's benevolence. Here prayer acts as a reminder to ourselves of the Source of our bounty.

A fourth function of tefilloh is that it acts as a conduit. In parshas Lech Lecho, Avrohom Ovinu davened for the recovery of Avimelech. Then the posuk tells us that Hashem remembered Soroh, and she became pregnant. Chazal explain that whoever davens for his friend and is in need of the very same request, is answered first. This statement is puzzling, because Hashem had already promised Soroh a child the year before. Since Hashem's promise is an absolute guarantee, why is Avrohom's prayer given credit for effecting Soroh's pregnancy?

HaRav Yeruchom Levovitz zt"l writes that without tefilloh, nothing goes. The water may be ready to flow, but without the pipes, it will go nowhere. Tefilloh is the pipeline for all of our successes.

We have listed here four functions of prayer. But one may wonder whether it is appropriate to want things to differ from how Hashem has arranged them. Is dissatisfaction with the status quo a lack of bitochon?

To answer this question, let us look back at Soroh Imeinu. We know that Soroh was correct in not accepting her situation, because she was supposed to have a child for the future of Klal Yisroel. Had she just sat back and accepted her situation, where would we all be today? Obviously, Hashem wanted Soroh to pray for a change in her circumstances. From here we learn that we must ponder what Hashem wants, and aim our goals and our prayers towards that.

The Rambam states that it is possible to live one's full life span, but then Hashem will add years to his or her life because the world still needs the person. Hashem can add intelligence if one davens for it. In fact, many of our gedolim davened for this and surpassed their given intelligence. We learn from this that Hashem sometimes wants us to try to change our situation via our prayers.

Practical Applications

The area of bitochon vs. hishtadlus is very individual, requiring each person to seriously and honestly analyze how much they should apply each. Except for a few lofty individuals, some level of hishtadlus is always required. The trick is to maintain our trust in Hashem while we make those efforts.

When HaRav Gifter zt'l developed a serious heart ailment, he was treated by the top cardiologist. Afterwards, Rav Gifter decided to go down one notch and see a very big specialist instead. After examining Rav Gifter, the doctor turned to him and said, "I just want you to know that we doctors don't know anything. Only the One Above can help! We just hope that we fulfill His wish and do not interfere with His plan."

Rav Gifter replied, "You're the doctor for me!"

Rav Gifter meant by this that a normal amount of effort mixed with a heavy dose of trust in Hashem were the correct recipe for combating health problems.

Another area that crops up is choosing between legal and illegal actions in order to achieve our goals. If one engages in prohibited actions for self-advancement, he is clearly displaying a weakness of trust in Hashem. He cannot claim that Hashem wishes him to act this way.

A farmer working the land during the shmittah year transgresses a severe prohibition. If he believed that Hashem provides his sustenance, how could he think that Hashem would require him to do something against His own will?

When a certain rosh yeshiva was asked his view on attending university as a means of hishtadlus, he would generally respond that universities are places of kefirah, minus, and Gehennom. He explained further that although Hashem expects us to make hishtadlus, He certainly doesn't want us to pass through Gehennom for that.

Throughout life we find ourselves facing situations in which we have to assess whether we should accept the status quo (gam zu letovoh) or make efforts and pray for change. For example, a growing family lives in a small apartment and encounters serious resulting difficulties: no room for clothing, no room for beds, etc. Is this a situation to simply accept or to try to change?

The measuring stick is our spiritual need. Is the situation beneficial for my spiritual achievement or not? Do I find my mitzvah performance stifled or not? If I want to change my predicament, I must first determine whether or not it is good for Hashem. Ovos tells us, "Asei ritzono ritzoncho, Make His will your will." If I desire more clothing, furniture or other possessions, what will Hashem gain from my acquiring them? If Hashem will gain, then I should go on with my efforts and prayer. If not, then I must drop them. In this case, we do not aim for what is politically correct, but for what is spiritually correct.

If after sincere contemplation, we still find a need for change, we must take the following three steps. First we must make a reasonable amount of hishtadlus. How often and how aggressive our efforts should be depends on the situation, but as we stated it must be within a normal range.

The second step is prayer. For proper tefilloh we must sincerely determine that our goals are for Hashem's sake. Then we emphatically pour our hearts out. We know that Hashem granted our forebears children after thousands of prayers. Sometimes special gifts are only earned after tremendous supplication.

The third step is bitochon. Given that my request will honestly improve my service to Hashem, there is no reason not to receive it.

With the commencement of a new year, we are granted a fresh start. We are considered new creations. What better time is there to examine our present situation? We have a wonderful chance to build our trust in Hashem, whether by accepting the situations in which we find ourselves or by trusting that Hashem will improve them. Either way, we should pray that Hashem help us to honestly strive towards the path that will most reveal His glory.

See Part 1

All material on this site is copyrighted and its use is restricted.
Click here for conditions of use.