Dei'ah veDibur - Information & Insight

A Window into the Chareidi World

23 Tammuz 5763 - July 23, 2003 | Mordecai Plaut, director Published Weekly









Produced and housed by
Shema Yisrael Torah Network
Shema Yisrael Torah Network











Home and Family

Urei Betuv Yerusholayim
by A. Reader


A highly educated girl from Russia, an architect by profession, earned her living by becoming a cleaner for a few people. When she got engaged, one of her `ladies' offered her some money for the wedding, but she refused. She claimed that her mother was going to send her some and she didn't like taking charity from people! (Not too many like that nowadays!)

The girl booked a caterer in a prestigious hall and made all the other arrangements entirely on her own. When her mother sent the money, two days before the wedding, the girl realized that it would not even pay for the hall, let alone the food, so she changed the venue to a cheaper place.

Someone asked her if she had bedding. "I sleep on a bed, now, and so does my chosson. We will use that bedding when we get married." Again, how many girls would do that?

She was asked if she had the bare essentials like cutlery or basic dishes, and she replied that she was sure she would get a few presents.

One young man decided to take matters into his own hands. He raised some money and went into various shops to buy all that a newly wedded couple needs to set up a Jewish home. He had each item gift wrapped by the shops and took them unobtrusively to the wedding hall. As each guest arrived, he handed them a card and asked them to write a nice message and slip it into one of the presents which they should then leave in the box which features prominently in every wedding hall. There was some money left which he put into envelopes and gave to the male guests of the chosson as their gifts.

It was an amazingly happy wedding even though most of the men were unknown to the chosson. The way they picked him up and danced with him, kissing and hugging him, an onlooker would have thought he was a dearly beloved younger brother.

[Well, wasn't he?]


Berel and Yankel (pseudonyms) run the local grocery store together. Berel is known for his constant acts of chessed. In fact, when he does his accounts at night, he occasionally marks down a large debt as `paid,' when he feels it is a desperate case. His brother Yankel, on the other hand, who usually runs the second checkout counter efficiently, is often in a dream world. A world of his own. When customers notice that it is one of his `spaced out' days, and that he is oblivious to the world around him, they usually queue up at Berel's checkout, although it might take a little longer. A few other relations stock up the shelves and then there is the Romanian worker.

Last week, it was one of Yankel's `off' days. Shimi, a man known to us all as not quite like other people, came into the shop in great distress. His mother had given him fifty shekel to do the shopping, and he had lost the money. He was distraught, and asked all and sundry if they had found his note. I watched Yankel leave his till. There were no customers waiting for him that day, as we were all queuing at Berel's counter. He called the Romanian worker outside and gave him something. I was not close enough to see what it was.

A few moments later, while we were still standing in line and the poor fellow was still ranting about the lost money, the worker came into the shop, holding up a fifty shekel note.

"I found this," he announced. "Did anybody lose some money?"

"Oh, yes!" Yankel sang out. "Hey, Shimi! Did you lose some money?"

Shimi hurried up to the Romanian and `recognized' his fifty shekel note. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

Is Yankel really in a world of his own?


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