Dei'ah veDibur - Information & Insight

A Window into the Chareidi World

1 Kislev 5760 - November 10, 1999 | Mordecai Plaut, director Published Weekly








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Pacing and Leading in Communications

Rabbi Shlomo Kory of Kiryat Mattersdorf, director of a Neuro-Linguistic Program, teaches us a basic element in good communication. His rules can be applied to good parenting and for good results in everyday adult conversation.

Preparing For The Future
Taking the Panic Out of Reading

by R' Zvi Zobin

Mr. and Mrs. Druk explained that their son Chaim's reading was very inaccurate. The initial screening showed that Chaim knew the alef-bais and vowels well, but when he read a text he had never seen before -- wow! his parents were correct. Chaim's version of the text seemed to be very different from the version printed in the book.

About Bedtime Stories by Professional Writers
by Devora Piha

Possibly, the most important time in a child's daily life is when he goes to sleep. This is when he reviews the day's activities, experiences, lessons and his impressions about them, consciously and subconciously, and digests them emotionally during his sleeping hours.

Self Diagnosis for Ear Problems

adapted from an article in Bayit Ne'eman by N. Katzin

Sixty percent of visits to a pediatrician deal with ear examinations and infections. In a great deal of them, we could have spared ourselves and the doctor the effort by some elementary examination into the ear, on our own, if we only had the equipment and some basic know-how.

Know Thyself
by Rosalie Salzman, Petach Tikva

Two events occurred recently which made me believe that I'm not doing too badly as a mother.

My son came home with his baseball bat and said some of his friends had wanted him to leave the bat with them and said that they wouldn't be his friends if he refused. He told me, "What do I care? My real friends will play with me whether I leave it there with them or not."

Your Medical Questions Answered!

by Joseph B. Leibman, MD

The Unseen World -- Part One

This next three articles that I will be'ezras Hashem, write concern the world of the most plentiful of Hashem's creatures. This unseen world contains viruses, bacteria and protozoa; we will concern ourselves with the ones that affect us.

Dietetic Delights

by Chedva Sternfeld

Still trying to get those Yomtov inches off your waist? Try these three.

Poet's Corner
Parroting or Parenting?

I know, Yankel, I know,

One hundred times, at least, you've told me so.

How I talk to our kids, that's how they'll talk to their own. In their own home.

I know, Yankel, I know, I'm wrong. Screaming is not a pleasant song.

But what can I do? I've tried so many different ideas. It doesn't go with ease.

And somehow, I always fall through. I can't help it if I do.

I really do want to talk nicely, but under pressure, I forget, and the shouts just come automatically when I fret.

But - one day, alone in the kitchen, I heard Rivky, I heard shouts.

But she's all by herself in the room. What's this all about?

I stalked into the room, ready to give her a piece of my mind, when I decided to stand and listen by the door, from behind.

"Sorele!" screeched Rivky, at her poor, innocent dolly. "How many times must I tell you? Get into pajamas RIGHT NOW - or I'll SHOW you how... And you, Tzippy, go brush your teeth this minute. Open your mouth and get that toothbrush in it!" Through the crack in the door, I saw Rivky pick up her teddy, and shake him to make him good and ready. "Yossi, I'm SO upset with you! Why haven't you put away your Lego, too? I thought you'd done it ages ago! Now I know!"

The wetness in my eyes merged the picture, and suddenly, it was years ahead. A young mother, Rivky has her own little brood to put to bed. The scene goes forward-fast, and I, the savta, stand in the doorway of the children's room, and listen aghast. My poor innocent einiklach! I love you so much! Why must your mother choose to put you to bed with screaming and a potch?

Please, Rivky, I beg silently, don't shout. Don't scream. They could get to bed just the same, and end up with happy dreams. Smile and laugh with them. Play with them. You could invent a tidying-up game, a race, against one another, against the clock face. With Tzippy, you could tell her you'll shut your eyes - while she quickly makes you a surprise.

And Sorele, with a kiss on her curly head, how quickly she would jump into bed.

Oh, Yankel, I think with a groan, how can I condone? How I wish I'd listened when you said - How you speak to your kids, is how they'll speak to their own!

But wait! It's not too late!

Rivky is still MY little girl. My precious treasure, my pearl. Hashem, I silently cry, Help me. Help me to erase the wrong impressions, to be patient, to raise them with compassion.

With a prayer in my heart and a smile on my lips, I enter the room, and plant, on Rivky's surprised face, a mother's kiss.

"Come, my darling. You're so very PRECIOUS. Tonight I want to have you all for myself. We'll get you ready for bed, before anyone else. And then, I'll tell you a story. Choose any book; I'll take it down from your shelf."

Rivky's eyes light up. She looks up at me and says, "Just one minute. Please? Could I just kiss my darling dollies first?" With pride, I am about to burst. "They're so very PWECIOUS to me! I want to put them to bed-- and I want you to see."

I nod. I smile. Yes, I can happily wait.

Thank you, Hashem, for teaching me -- before it's too late!

[We've lost the name and address of this writer from Kiryat Sefer. Could she please contact us at 02-5372303?]

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