This very fundamental shmuess can be read with profit
weekly for the next few weeks.
Chazal (Megilla 29a, Shulchan
Oruch 685) instituted the custom of reading the four
parshiyos from the Torah as a distinctive preparation
for Pesach, the yom tov of our redemption, since every
yom tov needs its own preparation. The combination of
all four parshiyos lays a complete groundwork for
Pesach. By reading parshas Shekolim and so on until
parshas Hachodesh, we increasingly smooth the way for
greeting the yom tov in a proper manner.
Elevating Bnei Yisroel
"And Hashem said to Moshe, saying, `When you take the sum
(lit., when you lift the heads) of bnei Yisroel
according to their number . . .'" (Shemos 30:11,
beginning of parshas Shekolim). The Midrash
(Pesikta Rabbosi 10:7) points out that the
posuk does not write "`when you count' but rather
`when you lift the heads.' This can be compared to a prince
who sinned against his father. The king said, `Go lift his
head' (i.e., execute him) . . . [The prince's teacher] said
to the [king]: `With the same order that you gave [to kill
him] you can elevate him. What did you say? "Lift his head" --
let them [instead] go and elevate him.' Once Moshe heard
[that because bnei Yisroel had sinned, HaKodosh
Boruch Hu intended to destroy them] he girded his loins
to defend [Yisroel]. [Moshe] approached HaKodosh Boruch
Hu and said: `Ruler of the World! You are wiping Your
children out of the world. Remember how much trouble You had
with them until You took them out of Egypt.' HaKodosh
Boruch Hu said to [Moshe]: `I swear that since you have
defended them, I will elevate and lift their heads through
you.'"
Obviously the Midrash explains that "lift the head" --
the way parshas Shekolim, the preparation for Pesach
begins -- relates to personal elevation.
Despair and Sadness
"By Dovid, a wise man. Praiseworthy is one whose cheit
is forgiven. Praiseworthy is the man to whom Hashem does not
ascribe iniquity" (Tehillim 32:1). The Midrash
(Yalkut Shimoni 2:718) writes, "`Praiseworthy is the
one whose cheit is forgiven' -- Praiseworthy is a
person more elevated than his sin, not one whose sin is more
elevated than he."
The Midrash is edifying us with a pivotal principle:
Every person, no matter how great a tzaddik, will
sometimes sin. Man's nature is to be a chotei.
Besides, of course, having to do teshuvah afterwards
for his aveiros, there is another factor to be taken
into consideration. After each sin man faces a great danger:
despair and grief, which envelop him. These feelings are
liable to lower him towards an even greater spiritual
destruction than that caused by the cheit itself. This
will not only prevent him from proceeding in doing
teshuvah but will seduce him to sin more than
before.
The Alter of Kelm was accustomed to explain that Amolek was
criticized to such a great extent because that nation caused
bnei Yisroel to feel lowly. "How he met you on the way
and smote the hindmost of you, all the weaklings in your
rear, when you were faint and weary" (Devorim 25:18).
Those "weaklings" were those whom the Clouds of Glory had
already cast out from their protection. Amolek caused their
weakness by making them feel substandard. Besides Amolek's
sin of being the first to fight against Yisroel after they
left Egypt, that war also made bnei Yisroel feel their
physical weakness and remember their servitude as slaves for
many years. This humbled them immensely.
Every person who sins naturally feels degradation and loss.
These feelings are liable to cause him to plunge deep into
despair, not to repent his sins, and thus be forever lost.
The first thing he should do is to urge himself to be "higher
than his sin," not to fall into a state of decline and
despair.
To Be Higher Than Sin
(Bereishis Rabbah 22:13) "Odom HaRishon met Kayin.
[Odom] asked him: `What was your judgment?' [Kayin] answered:
`I have done teshuvah and have achieved an
appeasement' . . . He said: `I was not aware of
teshuvah's power.' And immediately he started saying
`A psalm. A poem for the Shabbos day' (Tehillim
92:1)."
But where in the above posuk in Tehillim is
teshuvah mentioned or alluded to?
Dovid Hamelech alluded to teshuvah when he later
(ibid., 9) said, "But You, Hashem, are most high for
evermore." This is the alef-beis of
teshuvah.
We have already mentioned that a person should be higher than
his sin and not allow his sin to be higher than he. The first
point in doing teshuvah is not to lose hope of
improvement, not to permit a gloomy feeling to overcome
oneself and cause one to sink so deep into despair that he
cannot emerge from it.
HaKodosh Boruch Hu is elevated above everything, even
above sin -- "But You, Hashem, are most high for evermore." A
person's feeling of being above his sins helps him not to
plunge into despair, and it is one of the traits of
HaKodosh Boruch Hu. Odom HaRishon understood this and
sang the mizmor for Shabbos, in which Dovid Hamelech
explained the principle of teshuvah. This principle is
also hinted to in parshas Shekolim -- "When you lift
the heads of bnei Yisroel" -- meaning a person's
elevating himself. "`Praiseworthy is the one whose
cheit is forgiven' -- Praiseworthy is a person who is
more elevated than his sin, not one whose sin is more
elevated than he."
To Erase the Cheit
Even someone who has sinned and has done teshuvah has
much work before him until he can return to his previous pre-
sin status and be certain that he will not sin again. He must
erase any remembrance of his sin from the world. As long as
such a memory remains, he is liable to stray once again from
the Torah. Only after its memory is obliterated from the
world can he be sure he will not sin again.
The baal teshuvah who is elevated above his sin and
has not allowed his sinning to cause him to be gloomy or
despairing has all the same not yet finished his avoda
of teshuvah until he completely erases his sin, until
no impression of it remains.
We learn this point from our obligation to eradicate Amolek's
name. As long as there is a recollection of Amolek in the
world, Hashem's throne is not complete. "Amolek is the first
among nations" (Bamidbar 24:20) and is the source of
evil. All evil in the world stems from him. It is impossible
for kvod Shomayim to be revealed in the world while
Amolek still exists. Amolek's very nature conceals
HaKodosh Boruch Hu's honor, so the only way to reveal
Hashem's honor is by erasing Amolek's name, so that no
remembrance will remain. Only then will Hashem's honor be
completely revealed.
"Remember what Amolek did to you by the way, when you were
coming out of Egypt, how he met you by the way and smote the
hindmost of you, all that were feeble in your rear, when you
were faint and weary; and he feared not Elokim. Therefore it
shall be, when Hashem your Elokim has given you rest from all
your enemies round about, in the land which Hashem your
Elokim gives you for an inheritance to possess it, that you
shall blot out the remembrance of Amolek from under heaven;
you shall not forget" (Devorim 25:17-19).
When Amolek's name is blotted out from the world HaKodosh
Boruch Hu's honor will be uncovered. Now we can readily
understand that parshas Zochor was instituted to be
read after parshas Shekolim because after we conduct
ourselves in a lofty way, by being above our sins and
engaging in teshuvah, we must still erase our sin so
that no memory of it will remain. That is the second level in
the ladder of doing teshuvah.
Tohoroh
Even after doing teshuvah and having removed himself
from sin, a spirit of tumah still rests upon the
sinner. His teshuvah is imperfect until he is entirely
metaheir himself.
"R' Simloa'i expounded: A child in his mother's womb is
similar to a folded-up notebook, with his hands on both his
flanks, his arms resting on his shanks, his heels on his
buttocks, and his head placed between his knees, his mouth
closed and his navel open. He eats of what his mother eats
and drinks of what his mother drinks, and does not excrete
any wastes for fear that it might kill his mother. After he
emerges into the world what was closed opens and what was
opened closes. If this did not happen he could not live even
one moment. A lit candle is on top of his head and he gazes
from one end of the world to the other . . . He is taught the
entire Torah . . . and does not leave there until he is sworn
. . . . And what is the shevu'ah? `Be a tzaddik
and do not be a rosho. Even if the whole world tells
you that you are a tzaddik you must consider yourself
a rosho. Be conscious that HaKodosh Boruch Hu
is tohor and so are those who serve Him. The
neshomoh given to us is tohor. If you protect
it you have done well, but if not it will be taken from you'"
(Niddah 30b).
The gemora is explaining to us that life's essence is
tohoroh, and tumah is nothing other than death
itself. A person is told before he is born that if he is
metamei himself his neshomoh will be taken away
from him. In Shacharis we say, "My Elokim, the
neshomoh You placed within me is tohor." The
neshomoh is man's substance, and it depends upon the
amount of tohoroh within the person. Being
metamei oneself is like killing oneself. Any sin,
either big or small, is metamei a person. Someone who
sins greatly is heaping more and more tumah upon
himself.
We therefore understand that as long as the chotei has
not been altogether metaheir himself from the
tumah of the cheit he lacks the right to live.
Even doing teshuvah does not help as long as
tumah clings to him. Life is only life when it has
tohoroh. Even after doing teshuvah, when one
has removed his sin from himself and the world, he has still
not finished his avoda until he has been
metaheir himself from any tumah that has clung
to him.
Parshas Poroh after Parshas Zochor and Shekolim
We can now easily comprehend why Chazal arranged parshas
Poroh to be read after parshas Zochor and
Shekolim. The point stressed in parshas Poroh
is the tohoroh of Yisroel. "R' Acha said in the name
of R' Yosi bar Chanina: `When Moshe ascended to Heaven he
found HaKodosh Boruch Hu engaged in studying
parshas Poroh Adumah while holding His book and
reading, "This is the chukah of the Torah"
(Bamidbar 19:2). Why was Hashem reading this
parsha? HaKodosh Boruch Hu said: "I engage
Myself only in the tohoroh of Yisroel." Where do we
know this from? "The mouth of the tzaddik speaks
wisdom and his tongue discourses justice" (Tehillim
37:30). The mouth of the world's Tzaddik meditates on
wisdom -- He meditates on Torah. On which part of the Torah
does He meditate? On "This is the chukah of the
Torah"' (Pesikta Rabosi 14:6)." The Midrash is
explicitly relating to us that parshas Poroh deals
with the tohoroh of Yisroel. Tohoroh is needed
to perfect our teshuvah and prepare us for the yom
tov of redemption and the redemption itself.
Lack of Feeling
"Rovo bar Ula expounded (Shabbos 31b): `What does `For
there are no pangs at their death; their body is firm'
(Tehillim 73:4) mean? HaKodosh Boruch Hu said:
`Not only do reshoim not tremble or feel sorrow about
the day of death, but their hearts are firm.' This is as
Rabbah said: `"This is their way in their folly
(kesel)" (Tehillim 49:14) -- the reshoim
know that they are headed to death but they have fat on their
flanks (kislom). Perhaps you might say it is because
of forgetting -- [the Torah says,] "And their posterity who
approve their sayings" (ibid.).'" Despite the
reshoim being aware that they are heading to the path
of death, they are helpless to save themselves because "fat
covers their flanks," i.e., they are indifferent. They lack
feeling. They do not sense what they know well. Such a state
might as well be death, since a dead person, too, does not
feel anything. Like
wise these reshoim do not feel anything, so while they
are living they can be considered as if dead.
Becoming a New Person
"This month shall be to you the beginning of months"
(Shemos 12:1). There is a new moon every month.
Actually the Torah should have begun from this mitzvah of
kiddush hachodesh, as Rashi writes (Bereishis
1:1): "R' Yitzchok said: `The Torah should have started from
"this month shall be to you," which is the first mitzvah that
Yisroel were commanded. [The Torah] started from
Bereishis because `He has declared to His people the
power of His works, that He may give them the heritage of
nations' (Tehillim 111:6)."
In order to be zoche to be commanded to do mitzvos one
must revitalize his life. Bnei Yisroel left Egypt,
which was the greatest place of tumah in the world.
The seforim kedoshim tell us that in Egypt the Jews
were immersed in the forty-nine gates of tumah.
Someone who leaves such a tumah cannot receive the
Torah and the mitzvos without first becoming a person created
anew. Hashem therefore gave bnei Yisroel the mitzvah
of rosh chodesh, that reveals to us the power of
renewal, suggesting that each Jew can become a new person.
Only with this were they zoche to Torah and
mitzvos.
Likewise a baal teshuvah must know that even after he
does teshuvah and has been metaheir himself
from cheit he needs to become a new creation. Dovid
Hamelech said (Tehillim 51:12), "Create in me a clean
heart, Elokim, and make a new and steadfast spirit within
me." After Nosson Hanovi came to him and rebuked him for his
"sin," Dovid requested (v.3) "Be gracious, Elokim, according
to Your steadfast love; according to the multitude of Your
tender mercies blot out my transgressions." Even this was
insufficient, so Dovid also requested (v. 4): "Wash me
thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin."
Without such tohoroh a person's teshuvah is
incomplete and he is still considered a dead person. He is
required to become a new creation and procure for himself a
revival of life.
After Chazal instituted the reading in a minyan of
these parshiyos: Shekolim, Zochor, Poroh, their
takono was still unfinished until our teshuvah
is thorough. This is only achieved after we have acquired a
new spirit, as Dovid Hamelech requested. This is why Chazal
directed us to read parshas Hachodesh too.
The Order of Teshuvah
The conclusion is that we must carefully note the arrangement
of these parshiyos and learn from them the right order
of doing teshuvah. Parshas Hachodesh usually
falls during bein hazmanim. Studying these
parshiyos and learning from them the way that a person
must proceed while doing teshuvah obligates a person
to act differently during bein hazmanim. He must
strive for a "clean heart" and a "new and steadfast
spirit."
Although during bein hazmanim a person's
sedorim change, both in Torah study and in
tefilla, he needs to insure that his behavior will
befit what the coming yom tov requires. By doing so he
will be prepared for Pesach and will obtain the
segulah of these days of redemption.
HaRav Nosson Meir Wachtfogel zt'l was the mashgiach of the
Beis Midrash Govohah in Lakewood, New Jersey
